


Best Served Cold

by Cheyalinn_of_Tafth



Category: Bloodlines Series - Richelle Mead, Vampire Academy Series - Richelle Mead
Genre: After all these years, Aged-Up Character(s), Based on Songs, F/M, Rekindling, Revenge Plots, jealous dimka, many other characters will be mixed in here and there, mutual pining maybe?, plot divergence, the sydrian is strong in this one too, to get dimitri FEEL somthing goddamit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-03-08 21:11:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 36,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13466616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheyalinn_of_Tafth/pseuds/Cheyalinn_of_Tafth
Summary: Rose smirked, "You know what they say, dear Adrian, revenge is best served cold."or Adrian and Rose pretend to date just so they could get Dimitri (who was rumored to be with Tasha Ozera) to feel something, anything, after all these years





	1. Rose: Impossible (Shontelle)

It has been years ago. Years and years and years ago. Days and weeks and months had been piled up. Many things had happened to me.

I am now a professor in St. Vladimir's Academy. I am currently teaching elementary students. I would not have known that I had a passion for teaching little kids, or they just amaze me with their cute little faces and cute little gestures.

Well, whatever.

Now, Lissa is queen because of her half sister, Princess Jill Dragomir had showed up just in time for the elections weeks after Queen Tatiana had died because of a heart attack.

Christian Ozera had married my bestfriend and they had a daughter named Crizzalyn Rose Ozera.

Mia Rinaldi married her Guardian, Eddie Castile.

And Adrian Ivashkov...he's kinda fine. He's researching about Spirit and became very good about it. He no longer smokes or drinks. He only just wears too much healing charms.

My mom and my dad are now back together. With her his Guardian. They were all happy.

Really happy.

And I am happy and contented too, am I? I should have forgotten that already. It's been five years. Many things had happened. Too many. But I did not forget. My mother's words still echo in my head, in a repetitive manner like a broken CD. “Take caution when it comes to love, Rose. You might be playing with fire.”

I did, didn't I? Took caution when it comes to love, I mean.

I sighed and looked at my reflection in the mirror in my room's washroom. Nothing has changed much in my appearance. My hair was longer, had more muscles from training, scrawnier, and more refined. Now, I think before acting and knows what to do in every dire situations. Licking my dry lips, I bound my hip-length dark hair in a high ponytail, exposing my 67 molnija marks. Quite impressive, huh? Well, I fought in front lines whenever there's a Strigoi attack.

Killing Strigoi had been easier and easier the last few years for me. I blinked and exhaled. Time to go to work. I walked down the pathways and corridors.

The walls that reminded me of so much bitter memories...his hand touching my hair...his lips on mine...his soft brown eyes...

'Snap out of it, Hathaway!' I chastised myself. 'But he's so strong...and I was weak...I still couldn't let go of him...'

I looked at my class record and headed to my class. I walked inside my room decorated with kiddie posters and ABC's and 123's and everything colorful and was greeted by smiling sever-year-olds. But my thoughts was still with him...like it was every single day.

“Okay, class. What do we have today?” I asked them. They smiled at me.

One girl with blonde hair spoke, “Tell us another story, Professor Hathaway! Puh-leese!”

Then they are all pouting and saying those cute pleases. I smiled and sat my desk. “What do you want me to tell you?”

“Oh!” said a boy that reminds me of Christian Ozera a lot. “What about your love live, Miss Hathaway? That would be fun!”

The whole class began to agree with him. I sighed, “Okay, okay. I'll tell you guys a story about it.”

“YEY!” The children cheered. And in a minute they are all staring and listening at me intently as I started the story. “I was a sophomore when I met him. He's gorgeous and at the same time, super scary.”

I remembered when I first saw him. It was in Portland. When he caught me and Lissa running away.

Then I continued my story. From the time he was training me, to my adventures in Siberia and to the part he took the role as a Guardian of a royal Moroi and flew away with her and left me alone. Shattered.

“Oh, I am so sorry, Teacher Rose.” said the blonde haired girl.

I smiled weakly at them, “There were nothing to be sorry about. If he hadn't done it, I would be here with you guys what a disaster my love life had turned out to be.”

“What is his name, Miss Hathaway?” a girl with brown hair like mine asked. I opened my mouth to say that they didn't have to know his name when I was saved by the bell. They all stood up, saying goodbyes to me and walking outside my room.

I sighed. Dimitri Belikov...that was his name.

I can't say anything about it anymore. It's all done. He's gone so effortlessly. He had won. He's moved on...with none other than Christian's aunt, Tasha Ozera. We had no contact with them for the past five years. Or it's just me who had no contact with them. Why would I want to contact them? I would just ruin their now peaceful and happy lives.

All we had, Dimitri and I, was all completely gone now. Vanished in the wind. Hell, I was happy too, right? Happy. With a broken heart. He betrayed me. All of this was his fault. His words that I remembered that he told me in the cabin stung: "I love you, Roza. I'll always be here for you. I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

For five years, he's not there to catch my tears, not there to comfort me, not there to tell me everything is alright. I fell for what he said. So much for his empty promises. “Rose!” a voice familiar as my own called to me, forcing me out of my bitter reverie. I shot up and looked at the doorway.

There were five guardians formed in a semi-circle and in the center of it stood Lissa, Christian and their daughter, my godchild. “Hey, Auntie Rose!” she said as she run straight to me. I caught her and lifted her up and kissed her pale cheeks and she giggled. “I missed you, Auntie!”

I smiled, “I missed you too, Crizzie.” I walked towards the two of them and hugged them both. “So, what brings you here, Liss?” I asked her, shifting Crizza's weight on my other arm.

The famous Queen Vasilisa bit her lip, “I think Christian should explain it to you.” She turned to her husband who groaned.

He looked at me, “Rose, don't hate me for this but, my Aunt and Guardian Belikov are coming here. Tomorrow.”

WHAT? What did he just said?! Dimitri's coming back? Hell, I thought he was dead.

I gaped, “What? Here? Tomorrow?” I looked at Lissa, “No, no, no. Liss, you invited them to Crizza's 4th birthday!”

“No. Tasha insisted to come. She told us she would always come back here. And she wanted to attend the celebration.”

Oh, no. Could this day be any worse? “And they'll be staying here for how long?” I asked them. I wished it would be just two or three days.

“They'll be staying here in Montana for good, Rose.” Christian said, giving me a sympathetic pat on the back.

“Oh, no. And that Belikov agreed?”

Christian smirked, “He totally did.”

My mouth hung open. 

Lissa laughed at my expression. “Oh, Rose. You'll get through this. And we know you two will need to settle with your complicated feelings anytime soon. But why not now?”

I snorted, “It's already settled, Liss. He moved on to Tasha and I'm happy teaching kids here. Period. He...he doesn't love me anymore.”

“And you?”

“Liss...you know it would always be him. Him and him only.” Lissa looked at me, concern radiating from her gaze. “I'm sorry, Rose.”

I smiled. “No! It's okay, Liss.” I took her hand, using the one that was not supporting Crizza on my chest.

Gently, Christian took her now sleeping form from me. I nodded at them, “I'll be strong. I'll get through this.”

She smirked mischievously. “Oh, I've talked to Adrian about this. We planned something.” I was confused. Planned what? Planned something for what?

“What?”

Her smirk transformed into a full grin, “We planned that you and Adrian would pretend that you're dating.”

I was taken aback. That Spirit Geek and me...dating? No way.

“What? No way, Liss.”

“Look! It's the only way! You could get back to Dimitri and by making him kinda jealous, you'll be able to know if he still loves you or not!”

I smirked, “You know, Liss, you are our queen for a reason.” Then we all laughed.

“So, where's Adrian?” I asked once our laughter had subsided.

“He'll be here tomorrow night. As Tasha and Dimitri will be here tomorrow afternoon.”

“Great. He already know what to do?”

Christian grinned, “Of course, he turned into a badass geek, right?”

Then, we all laughed again. Lissa told me goodbye and I went to my classes without any worry.

I would get through this. With revenge. Even though all of the possibilities of me and a certain Russian god getting back together seemed so impossible.


	2. Dimitri: Home (Daughtry)

I groggily opened my eyes and stared daggers at my alarm clock. I used all of my energy left to turn it off. It's already 5 o'clock in the afternoon. In human time. So, it's technically dawn. Dammit. I hate going by human time.

 

After five long, agonizing years, I still not used to it. It felt so foreign to me. All the time I stayed here in England, I just felt so...so alien. Like that I don't belong here. But living with Tasha had been a luxury. She has money. We went to landmarks and parks. Everywhere that is so beautiful. She showed me all the beautiful places in this world.

 

But why is it not beautiful enough for me?

 

I threw all the covers off of me and stood up, walking straight into the shower. I undressed and the water started to clean me. I hoped it would clean me out of everything, especially my thoughts. I really needed to get rid of them.

 

Well, I still can't believe Tasha decided for us to come back to the States. She just told me this ridiculous plan of hers just yesterday. It's time I suppose, to go back to the place where I found myself. To the place where I felt truly happy and contented.

 

Why did I leave in the first place? I thought leaving would be a solution to forget everything. Of me being Strigoi. Of me hurting hundred of innocents. Tasha helped me to recover and to forgive myself that took years.

 

Of course, she was successful. I had forgiven myself for everything. But the memories of the past still haunts me, day by day. No fail. Of me hunting and killing without mercy. Of me feeding off Rose just for fun.

 

My heart froze at the thought. Rose. My Roza. I left her alone. I never knew what happened to her ever since. I just know Vasilisa is now the Queen and she married Tasha's nephew, Christian. Rose isn't one of her Guardians. But why? All of her life she wanted so badly to be her Guardian.

 

I started to recall the time I first talked to her: “ _Stupid,_ _but still brave. Why did_ _you even try it?” She looked at me. "Because I'm her guardian.”_

 

She'd risk anything to be the Queen's protector but what's holding her back? A thousand possibilities popped in my thoughts. Maybe she has other assignments? No. She wouldn't do that. Lissa was her priority.

 

They come first.

 

Maybe she married some Moroi and chose to be a housewife? No. Rose would never give up being a Guardian just like that.

 

Maybe she...NO! She's not dead! She can't be, right? She's too strong for that. Hell, one way to find out.

 

I turned off the shower and took the towel and wrapped it on my waist, blocking all of the thoughts inside my mind. I dressed in black and white, as all guardians do.

 

 

I took my luggage and went down the stairs. While staying here in England, Tasha and I lived in an apartment along with her other two guardians. It's a two-storey apartment, with four bedrooms. I reached the end of the stairs, meeting the other two Guardians standing at the living room, Josh and Miley. They are lovers. Their love had developed through the five years of us living together. I always looked at Josh with envy.

 

He had his happy ending. Lucky bastard. They both smiled at me. Josh had his arm around her waist and she was resting her head on his shoulder. They are dressed as guardians like me. They both had their stakes on their belts. I took my stake from where it's resting on the wall beside the door and placed it on its holder on my belt.

 

“So. You ready, Belikov?” Josh asked me.

 

Of course they knew about me and all of my adventures in the past. I nodded, “So, why are we going back? Just Tasha told us to?” Josh laughed and Miley pulled away in order to stand beside him. “Yes. But she wanted to go back a few weeks later but Queen Vasilisa invited her to her daughters birthday today. So we're going now.”

 

Seeing my expression of shock, they laughed again. “Don't worry, Russian guy. We came across some freshly graduated guardians from St. Vladimir's earlier. They told us the school is much cooler.” She smirked, “They even mentioned a hot badass teacher that could kill Strigoi in seconds. I wonder where she came from.”

 

I raised my brow, “That 'hot badass teacher' was a girl?” Her smirk deepened, “That's what the new boys told us.”

 

Then Tasha burst out of her room and practically ran downstairs, dragging her luggages along with her. “Come on, Dimka! I don't want to be late!”

 

The jet ride was an uneasy one. I can't keep my focus, which bothers me. We're up here so I guess Strigoi won't attack us here.

 

With Tasha's request, the school's jet had fetched us to bring us at Court. But what throwing off my focus is I'm coming back to the place I left years ago. Has something changed? I asked myself what changes should I be expecting to see. Maybe they re-painted the Court? New guardians? Unfamiliar faces?

 

One question corrupted all of the others: Will I see Rose there? Maybe. Yes. No. I don't know. I bit my lip. More and more questions popped into my head: Where is she now? What is she doing? Is she doing just fine? What is her assignments now? And most of all: Does she still remember me?

 

I sighed. Maybe. Maybe not. It's been a long time. But is it enough to erase me from her memory? As a tough girl –no, woman– as she is, most likely. As I delve deeper in my thoughts, I didn't even realized that we already landed.

 

I stood up took my and Tasha's luggage and took off the jet first, looking around for threats. Instead of seeing Strigoi, I saw Eddie Castile and Mia Rinaldi standing by their black and obviously new SUV. They smiled and waved when they saw us taking off the jet. Eddie and Mia walked toward us and Eddie helped us to carry luggages.

 

“Hey there, Belikov!” he said to me.

 

He turned to Tasha and bowed, “Greetings, Lady Ozera. We shall escort you back to Court.”

 

She smiled, “Thank you, Guardian Castile. And Hello, Mia.”

 

The Moroi smiled at us, “Hello!”

 

Eddie took her hand, “Let me introduce you my wife, Mia Rinaldi Castile.”

 

With that, Tasha, standing beside me clapped in joy. “Really? You two are married? Wow! I can't believe it! Right, Dimka?” she turned to me.

 

I just nodded and turned to Josh and Miley who are standing behind me, wearing guardian masks. “Guardian Castile, Mrs. Castile, these are Guardians Josh and Miley Borovsky.” After handshaking, we rode the SUV. I was sitting in what Rose called 'shotgun', with Eddie driving.

 

While Mia and Tasha are talking and gossiping, I asked Eddie some questions. “So, what happened back there?” I started.

“Pah. Lissa's Queen. She's married to Lord Ozera and they had a beautiful Moroi daughter, Crizzalyn Rose. Jill is now a Dragomir Princess.” he turned to look at me. “Everything's perfect now, Guardian Belikov.”

 

Before I could ask what did he meant, his gaze was now back at the road as he continue. “Adrian Ivashkov is now a Moroi teacher that resides in Court, specialized in Spirit. He teaches how to manipulate and control Spirit. Hell, he improved a lot. And Rose...” he trailed off. What the hell happened to her?

 

Why keep us all in suspense?

 

“What?” I prompted. He sighed, blinking several times.

 

“Darling.” Mia called from behind. I just noticed they are all listening to our talk. “Don't push it. You don't have to tell him what happened to poor Rose.”

 

Tell me what? What happened to her? It's not bad, isn't it? And _'poor Rose'._ Why would she describe my Roza as poor? I'm going insane because of not knowing anything! _I'm not seeing her grave. I'm not seeing her grave. I'm not seeing her grave._ I chanted over and over again. Then in the blink of an eyes, we arrived. We're here in the court in East Coast, like Tasha said. But why not in the queen's court in Pennsylvania?

 

Why here? We got off the SUV and walked inside. The grounds were transformed with tables, chairs, high linens and dhampirs and Morois in their dresses and suits. We walked straight inside the residential wing of the court and they picked us rooms next to each other's.

 

Tasha and I have separate rooms and Josh and Miley shared one. I went into the washroom and washed my face and changed into my suit for the party. I picked up Tasha from her room. Josh and Miley are standing close behind.

 

Tasha turned around to look at us, “You are all off duty today, okay? I'll request some guardians in duty to guard me.” I started to open my mouth to protest when she stopped me. “Especially not you, Dimka. You need to reconcile with your old friends.” Without saying a word we all went to the party. Josh, Miley, Mia, Eddie and I shared one table. Tasha was talking and laughing with her old friends with her requested guardian close behind.

 

When the Queen arrived, she spotted me first. “Hello, Guardian Dimitri. Nice to see you again.” I stood up in an instant and bowed, “Greetings, your majesty.”

 

She laughed, “No need. You're not told, aren't you? I have implemented that I should not be addressed formally in parties.”

 

I flushed in embarrassment. “I'll try to remember the next, Miss Dragomir.”

 

What would I call her? She needed to be respected! She laughed yet again.

 

“You forget, it's Mrs. Ozera now.”

 

Then, Christian approached us. Christian gave her a peck on the lips. “Crizza's asleep. She's with her Aunt now.” Vasilisa nodded. He smiled when he turned to me.

 

“Oh! Hey there, Belikov! How is it going? It's been years, is it not?” I nodded, “I've been fine, Lord Ozera.”

 

He grinned, “I can see that.”

 

The Queen licked her lips, “We need to talk to you, Guardian Dimitri. Now.”

 

I nodded and followed them. When we are in a place where there isn't much people, I started. “Is it about Rose?”

 

They both nodded. I exhaled and readied myself for the worse. “So, is she...dead?”

 

They both burst out laughing.

 

“Rose? Dead? No way. She's immortal,” Christian said and they laughed even more.

 

Have you ever seen a Queen laughing so hard? Well, it was happening right in front of me. When their laughter had subsided, they were both panting.

“Well, Belikov. Rose's still alive. Barely.” Christian said. “She's there inside the building right now.”

 

My heart skipped a beat. Rose...is here? And perfectly well? But why Eddie and Mia regarded her as if she died? I forced the thought out of my head.

 

“She's now a teacher in St. Vladimir's. And one of the best the Academy has ever seen,” continued the Queen. “You can see her and talk to her. As the Queen and her bestfriend, I allow you to. But I advise you not to talk to her about the past. Or else your heart will stop in five seconds.”

 

I nodded and walked past them. I walked past the Queen and her husband without thinking about it. The thought has not been formed when my legs started to move. I reached the building in no time. And there. There was no person in the waiting area of the building except for three.

 

I recognized the two because they were both facing me. It's Alberta and Hans. Old friends. Then my gut told me I'd found who I was longing to see again.

 

My Rose. My Roza. Her back was facing me but I'm so sure it was her. Really her. She was talking to Alberta and Hans by the grounds animatedly. Her dark hair, even bound in a high ponytail, had still reached her waist. It's so...majestic. She noticed Alberta and Hans gaze past her and turned to look where they are staring and saw me.

 

She's still a goddess. Her wide mocha eyes, guarded by her long eyelashes. Her full red lips I wanted so badly to caress with mine. Only my training kept me from running straight into her small yet strong arms. I remembered what she told me about being a female Guardian. “ _Me. Turning into Alberta. Her…and all the other female guardians. They're all leathery and stuff. Fighting and training and always being outdoors—they aren't pretty anymore. This…this life. It destroys them. Their looks, I mean.”_

 

For her case, it made her much, much more beautiful. It was like all of the beautiful places Tasha and I had visited had lost their beauty by a single look from her. She was wearing a red sleeveless dress with a low neckline that reached her ankles.

 

This was it. The most beautiful scenery I always long for. Her. My Roza. She smiled at my way. I didn't noticed Tasha beside me, smiling back at her. I'm so...so right. I don't belong there. To England. I belong here. Here in the States. Here in Court.

 

Here...with Rosemarie Hathaway. Here where my heart is. Here...is my home. After five years, I'm finally home.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, you can talk to me on twitter! follow me @quakeroatkeeper
> 
> thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!! please leave me some kudos right below!
> 
> love lots,  
> cheya


	3. Rose: Should've Said No (Taylor Swift)

As Hans and Alberta saw them, they backed up and retreated quickly.

Giving the visitors –more like 'nightmares' for me– quick embraces and welcome backs. Within five minutes, they had walked outside to mingle with the others. I'm alone. With them. My worst nightmare comes to life. Yet I'm not sleeping.

I panicked. _Where was Adrian? He must be here by now! It's dark already! I don't want to deal with this alone!_ He's here, standing a few meters away from me.

Dimitri. Looking directly at me with his guardian mask. His soft shoulder-length hair draped loose, his dark eyes...I should've lunged at him and killed him but the charm Lissa gave me earlier kept me from where I stood. Miraculously and for the first time ever and hopefully the last, Tasha saved me from looking at that Beli-whatever. I turned to her and faked a smile on her way. She smiled back and waved. I took all the courage inside of me to walk toward them and hug Tasha. I know I didn't like her much. But I must like her for the things she'd done for me. She took Dimitri off of my back to made me realize that I was better of without him. He looked at me and I glared at him in return.

' _Look at me now, Beli-whatever!'_ I tried to tell him through my piercing look. _'Look what I had achieved without you! If you were here with me, if you hadn't left me shattered, I would still be crazy about you.' Wait, I still do, right?_ A voice inside my head said. I quickly shrugged it off. _No. I'm not. Not anymore._ I kept telling myself that but my whole system kept saying: _Liar! Liar! Liar!_

“Hey, Tasha! How's England?” I asked, pulling a fake friendly face.

She smiled, “It's fun staying there. We went to visit some places so...so beautiful! The Big Ben...Buckingham Palace...Westminster Abbey...everywhere! Right, Dimka?” She turned to Dimirti and touched his arm lovingly. I tried hard not to stare daggers at the hand that had just contacted his skin. _Of course they are now a couple! They are living in the same house for five years!_

When Dimitri just nodded, she continued her bragging. She kept talking and talking and talking and talking and talking. I didn't recognized a single word that came out her mouth. I was busy staring at her. She's beautiful. Too beautiful. Those blue eyes and black hair... I guess that's why Dimitri decided to live with her. She's a perfect fit for him. Then in that one moment, I'm not there standing in front of Tasha and Dimitri.

I was back to my dorm room, five years ago...

_“_ _Rose! I need to talk to you.” I groaned, stood up from the bed and opened the door. My mom was standing there, wearing her guardian face._

_She's wearing her usual guardian uniform and she's clutching an envelop in her right hand. “What is it, mom?” I asked her, wearily. “It's about Guardian Belikov.”_

_“_ _Oh! What happened? Had they believed that he's really a dhampir now?”_

_She nodded, “Yes. Lady Ozera really put up a fight for him at the Court.” I nodded in understanding. Of course Tasha would fight for him. She loved him..._

_“Okay. Then...” I prompted her. She handed me the envelop. I took it and frowned. “What's this for?” “_

_Rose,” she said, quietly. “He regained his Guardian status again. He told me to give that to you.”_

_I wore a guardian mask like her to prevent myself from squealing. “Huh? What for?” My mother, the great Guardian Hathaway, took a deep breath. “He's gone, Rose. Immediately after the court gave him back his status, he took the role as Lady Ozera's guardian. They left. To England. Guardian Belikov told me it was nice tutoring you.”_

_I nodded, tears threatening to spill down my cheeks. “That's...that's a lot to take in.” She touched my shoulder lightly, “Yes, I know. The two of you become close friends, am I right?” Not just close friends, Mom... I could just nod. “Where are they?”_

_“Well, I guess they're still downstairs. If you want to say goodbye...” She trailed off. Because I'm long gone._

_I reached the main doors panting hard. All I see is the empty grounds of the Academy. No cars. No Tasha. No Dimitri. The wind blew, caressing my cheek. Giving me sympathy. Alberta noticed me and walked over._

_“Oh, Rose. They just left.” I looked at her and seeing my expression, she gathered me in her arms and I started to sob. I let the envelop flew from my grasp. The lightnees of it allowed to be carried by the strong wind._

_Away from me..._

“Rose! Rose..” I snapped back at reality. Tasha and Dimitri and both looking at me, worried.

“Are you okay, Rose? You look sort of..pale.” Tasha said, touching my cheek for a second.

I nodded, “I'm okay, Tasha. I'm just...tired. From a lot of things.”

“I can see you're busy. Are you still a guardian?” I shook myself and grinned. “Not anymore.”

“Why?” she asked me. I glanced at Dimitri, who stayed silent the whole conversation. Did Tasha cut his tongue while they were in England?

“Well, it's a long story.”

She nodded, “Okay. I guess we're short in time right now. But what are you doing these days?”

My smile widened, “I'm a professor now. In St. Vladimir's.”

She grinned, “Wow! That's fantastic! You teaching little kids, I take it?”

I just nodded, looking at a surprised Dimitri. “That's cute. It's nice of you to share what you learned.” She glanced at Dimitri, “From a great teacher.”

I waited for his response, but he just looked like Tasha didn't complimented him.

I smiled. A real one. “Yeah. A great teacher.”

She smiled and nodded, “How long have you been teaching now?”

“Three years.”

She placed a hand on my shoulder, “You really had grown a lot, Rose.”

I chuckled, “Yep. The reckless and stubborn Rose is long gone.”

Tasha laughed, “And replaced by..?”

“It was replaced by a wicked one.”

Then we both laughed. “I'm so glad to be back, Rose. Very glad. I knew I wouldn't regret my decision.”

_Oh, you will, Tasha. You'll regret it really, really bad._

“Yes. I'm glad, too.” I lied. What could I say?

She licked her lips, “And Rose, can we go back to the party now? And you need to rest.” _Hell, like she's really concerned._ I nodded.

She leaned and kissed me on the cheek, “See ya later, Rose. Oh, Professor Hathaway.”

I smiled and turned around to walk back to my quarters. I really need some planning and thinking. Before I took my seventh step away from that dreaded spot, I heard my name being called.

“Rose...” I spun around to see Dimitri still standing there.

I groaned and walked toward him. “What do you want? Tutorials for your kids? Well, I'm free thursdays and fridays so–”

“Roza!” I blinked. His voice was filled with agonizing pain. Well, it should be that way. I need to get back at him.

“What, Dimka?” I said, imitating Tasha.

He exhaled, “Roza...” I took one step forward.

“Was it worth it, Comrade?”

He stared at me, saying nothing. Did he brought his ears with him?

“Was. It. Worth. It?”

He blinked and looked down. Well, I took it as a yes.

“Was she worth this?” I asked.

He looked at me, piercing me with those brown eyes I fought not to get lost in. “What she worth what?”

“This.” I gestured to me and him. I thought twice about what am I about to say.

Come on. Let's try testing his conscience and guilt.

“All of this.” I exhaled. “We shouldn't be here talking like this. We should've been out there. Holding hands. Greeting people. Having fun. Loving each other. Why, Dimitri?”

By this time, he looked shattered. Mm, that's what I'm looking for.

He took a deep breath. “Roza...”

I shook my head and took several steps backwards. “You should've said no, Comrade. Now look what you've done.”

I knew my words stung. Now, I need a grand exit to finish the scene. So I spun and walked away from him with a devilish smirk on my face.

_Good job back there, Hathaway._

 


	4. Dimitri: Lips of an Angel (Hinder)

“Hey, Belikov! Welcome back!” Guardian Petrov said, walking towards me, Dr. Olendski by her side.

“Alberta, nice to see you.” I responded kindly.

“Same old Dimitri.” remarked Dr. Olendski.

“It's late now, Alberta. What's the delay?” I asked her.

“Oh! Dr. Olendski and I talked to Professor Ivashkov.”

Ivashkov? I raised one eyebow, “Professor Ivashkov?”

Dr. Olendski smiled at me, “Yes. Professor Adrian Ivashkov.”

Oh, Right. He's a teacher now, too. Guardian Castile had told me that earlier. Yes, I can manage that. But if he and Rose... Why am I thinking of breaking his bones with my bare hands already? I kept my tone calm and managed to put up a fake curiosity.

“Oh, I see. But why him? Are you running out of teachers?”

Alberta grinned, “No. He's the only one who deserves the job. He's changed. He came all the way from Italy a year ago. He studied Spirit there.”

Well, at least he didn't spend that mich time with my Roza. I nodded, “Good for him.”

They smiled, bid their goodbye and moved on to talk to other acquaintances. I decided to get some drinks when...

“Dimitri!” I turned around to see Lissa and Mia leaning toward someone on the grass. “Dimitri!” Lissa's voice was already shaking.

“It's Rose!” The others are now panicking. I made my way to their location and what she'd told me earlier came flooding back.

“Was it worth it, Comrade?”

I came over to them and gently picked her up in my arms. She was unconscious. Her lips are pale and she was completely limp. I ran to the infirmary in the Court, with the Queen and Dr. Olendski hot on my trail. When we reached one of the bed, I carefully laid Roza down.

What happened to her? Is she alright? Will she be waking up soon? I sat down on a monoblock chair beside the bed and buried my face in my hands for a moment while asking myself questions. What have I done? Why did Roza deserve all of this when it has been all my fault?

“What happened, Dr. Olendski? Should I heal her? Is she gonna be alright?” Queen Vasilisa asked her, her voice shaking with fear and worry.

When Dr. Olendski didn't respond, the Queen let out a sob. “Dr. Olendski, I should heal her now.”

“But your majesty–”

“Please step aside.” she said, with her weak but firm voice. Having no other options, Dr. Olendski obeyed.

Before Lissa took one step forward, Christian Ozera caught her arm. “Lissa, you shouldn't. The darkness.”

She shook her hand, trying to break free. “I don't care! Christian, this is Rose we are talking about!” she exclaimed. “I can let her be that way! She doesn't deserve this fate!”

Christian's face was stone hard. By this time, our Queen was crying uncontrollably. He was now holding her fists tight.

“Lissa! Lissa! Snap out of it!” I knew he was the one who can only do this to her and to speak to her like that. Except, of course, Rose. “Rose isn't dead! This isn't like the last time!” With that, she stopped crying. Lord Ozera took her and kept her in his arms, making soothing sounds.

Dr. Olendski is now checking Rose's pulse. “She's alright now, your highness.”

Lissa's head turned toward the doctor. “What? Isn't she alright moments earlier?”

Dr. Olendski looked down. “When you brought her in here, her heart had stopped beating.”

Oh. My. God.

No.

“What?” I blurted out. The doctor turned to me, “I really thought she's...gone.” Now tears are forming in her eyes. “But when I checked again for confirmation, it was beating again. And it was just from exhaustion. She had a very long day.”

I really wished it wasn't because of me...

“Thank God.” I muttered before slumping back on my chair.

“Lissa.” I heard Christian say. “We need to go now. I promise you we would come back early tomorrow.”

She managed to nod.

Christian turned to us, “Farewell, Dr. Olendski, Guardian Belikov.”

Then they're gone.

“Dimitri. You should go now too.” Dr. Olendski said. “I'm sure Tasha is waiting for you.”

Tasha. I can't believe I actually had forgotten about her! She's my charge! Why am I so stupid? But I have to be with my Roza. No, I needed to be with my Roza. Right now.

“No need.” I said gently. “Guardians Josha nd Miley Borovsky could take care of her just fine. Besides, it was my day off.”

She nooded, “Shall I leave then?” I nodded. She checked Rose's pulse once more and then left.

Alone with my Roza. With her unconscious. I scooted my chair closer and took her hand. It was cold. Palms down, I kissed her knuckles. The memory of our talk earlier came rushing in.

“Was. It. Worth. It?” She said slowly. Every word she spat out were like poison.

I just blinked and looked down. I can't make a scene right now. I didn't reply. Because if I did, I would end up running straight for her.

“Was she worth this?” she asked. I knew she was talking about Tasha. And what I had sacrificed. I looked at her, trying to say how much I missed her and how much my love for her had grown...

Instead, I chose to be innocent.

“What she worth what?”

“This.” She gestured to both of us. “All of this.” She exhaled. “We shouldn't be here talking like this. We should've been out there. Holding hands. Greeting people. Having fun. Loving each other. Why, Dimitri?” She's right. We should've been happy and so...so deeply in love. Regret consumed me. And I can't explain her why. By this time, I knew I looked shattered.

“Roza...” I whispered.

She shook her head and took several steps away from me. Every step felt like a million miles. “You should've said no, Comrade. Now look what you've done.”

With that she walked away from me. And I felt my whole world shattering.

The doors burst open, making me jump. I was completely off guard. At the door stood none other than the mighty Spirit Professor Adrian Ivashkov. Hell, he looked different. More respectable. He wore Blue polo shirt and black slacks. He's hair was combed neatly, just like any other teachers. He strode over to my Rose. My Roza. Not his.

He turned to me, “What happened here, Belikov? Explain!” he yelled at me. How dare him speak to me like that? As if she's his husband! I stood up, fighting the urge not to punch him. Hard.

“Professor Ivashkov, Professor Hathaway fainted from exhaustion. She's okay now. Just resting.”

“Out. Belikov. Out!” he exclaimed, pointing at the door.

“Adrian...” I heard Rose whispered.

“Rose!” he said, turning to her. Our arguments all but forgotten. Temporarily, of course.

She opened her eyes, “Adrian. Dimitri. Don't act like you're gonna rip each other's throats any second now!”

“Sorry, Rose.” Adrian mumbled.

She rolled her eyes. “Not to me. To him. And Dimitri, you too.”

After saying fake apologies and bone crushing handshakes, she smiled. “Good.” Adrian pouted at her, “Don't treat me like one of your seven-year-old students again, little dhampir. Or else...”

She tsked, “Oh, no. Don't use your outta-this-world powers on me, Ivashkov. You know I can kick your ass anytime. I can kick it now.”

Adrian grinned, “Sure thing, liitle dhampir.”

She giggled. Rose Hathaway actually giggled. And she's weak. I felt something biting and burning in my chest. Like someone had just shot me straight in the heart with a million pistols. Even that can't compare to the pain I felt inside.

Adrian turned to me, “You can leave now, Guardian Belikov. I'm here now.”

I looked at my Roza, “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “Thank you and you may now leave, Guardian Belikov. Lady Ozera might want you by her side.”

My heart broke at her words. Clearly, she wdidn't want me here. Am I that ugly? Am I too old? Am I fat now? I could just nod. I turned around and exited. She really does hate me. And, she really had forgotten what we had. When I entered my room, I took a fast shower and changed my clothes. I jumped to my bed and concentrated my mind on to what am I going to do next. Instead, I remember the time I regret so much.

“Lady Ozera! Tasha!” she turned and looked at me. “Dimka! You're a Guardian again! Isn't it fun?”

I looked awed, “They really...agreed?”

She nodded, “Hell, I woudn't put up that fight if I knew that won't work.”

“Where are you going now?”

She smiled, “Gonna pack up. I'm leaving for England. To London, actually. I'll be staying there for some years, I suppose. I needed some new surroundings.”

Without knowing what I'm doing, I got down on both knees. “Lady Natasha Ozera, may I have the pleasure and honor to serve you as your Guardian?” She grinned and pushed me up. She hugged me, “Of course, Dimka!”

I shook the bitter memory away.

What occurred to my being to do that? And why? Why...in that moment...Rose hadn't entered my mind? Why didn't I thought about her? Why? Tasha's just in the next room...I could go to her and tell her I quit...

No. It would break her. Destroy her. Shatter her. Breaking another heart was the least of my list to do now. I had broken Roza's, I wouldn't dare to do it again. And it's Tasha. She helped me forgive myself. She helped on my feet again. I owed her my life. But Roza...she was worth everything. I would give anything in this world to touch her hair again, to caress her cheek once more, to kiss her lips, to claim her as mine...mine and mine only.

Forever.

Why can't Rose be Tasha? Why does she had to be miles away?

“Dimitri...” I remember her voice as it spoke... it was a luxury. Of hearing my name coming from the lips of an angel. But not just any other angel, it was my Roza. The woman I love and will love for all eternity.


	5. Rose: Better than Revenge (Taylor Swift)

“Come on, Adrian! Think harder! I know your geekness will come up with something! Just make it come up now!” I exclaimed.

I wish we decided to meet in my room so I could find some devices to include in our evil plan. But as we are in his room, all I can find are books and books and books. But, as usual, he has a point of making his room our 'planning place'. No one would try to barge in. Especially not Tasha the bitch and Dimitri the fool. We were sitting on his bed, wrappers of empty Cheetos all around us.

“I'm trying, little dhampir! But we can't make him jealous like this! He's rock hard, and you know it!”

I nodded, “Right. But if we came out as 'dating' and tell everyone about it, he would take it as a damn gossip!”

Adrian's eyes lit, “But...if we flirt in front of him, he might take it seriously.”

“How?”

“Let's invite him to dinner or something. Our Queen would think of something, of course.” I nodded in agreement. Adrian being a smartass made him ten times hotter. Seriously. And he's the kind of nerd who doesn't wear glasses and jumpers. He's the nerd who happened to have a fairly great taste of fashion. He knew what clothes he should wear to make him incredibly handsome. I mean, hundreds of girls, Moroi, human and dhampir alike, had expressed their pledge of undying love for him. They even courted him.

He's _that_ hot.

He tapped his chin repeatedly, knocking my gaze from his lips.

“How about Tasha?”

Hell, he's fucking right. How about that immensely annoying bitch? She who barged in and took Dimitri out of my arms in milliseconds. And she has to pay for that. She left me bloody. _They_ left me bloody. I kept forgetting that Dimitri is the one who wanted her. But still, she took him from me.

I crossed my arms, “Tasha?” I kept my voice cool and innocent.

“Yes. Tasha. She'll go with Dimitri. And then he'll ignore you and give her the attention instead.”

I groaned, “No. It's more like the opposite. Tasha is Dimitri's charge. He wouldn't go if she doesn't.”

Adrian licked his lips, “Then don't invite Dimitri. Invite Tasha.”

I nodded, “Yes. But there are chances that he won't come. Like if it's his day off.”

Adrian pouted, “I hate it when you're right, little dhampir.”

I smirked, “I know.”

“And...Dimitri could tell Tasha he doesn't want to come with her.”

“And she can always drag her other guardians with her.” I finished his sentence as the realization came. It was my turn to pout, “What are we gonna do now?”

“I guess being affectionate in public would be a good start.”

I stood and faced him, “You're right. We could just come out as two teachers have these strange feelings towards each other.”

He grinned and stood beside me, “And we can work it from there.”

I grinned back, “Yes. We can.”

I glanced at his wall clock. I need to go to Lissa. We both needed to go. “We gotta go. Gonna be late.”

He arched one eyebrow, “It's a Sunday, little dhampir. We don't have classes.”

“Yes. And I have to go back to St. Vlad's later afternoon. I heard Lissa...” I trailed off.

Adrian grinned, “Right. She transferred me to St. Vladimir's to let us plan easily. Clever.”

I grimaced, “Of course she is! She's Lissa, you idiot! And we need to meet her now. Like right now.” I punched his arm playfully, “Let's go, Professor Ivashkov.”

 

* * *

 

Our way to Lissa was quite satisfying. Some Moroi and Guardians saw me and Adrian 'sneaking' from his room.

And if they had the right assumptions, this would be all too easy. Except one part, as Adrian said: Tasha. That bitch! Urgh. Why does she always have to ruin everything?

Adrian and I walked toward Lissa's office silently. Good. He knew I had to settle things in my mind right now. Smartass. Well, about Tasha, I had to deal with her. But how could I? I'll be jealous of her. Well, I'm extremely jealous now. How could I prevent myself from ripping her throat out? How could I keep myself from getting jealous and pretend to be falling for Adrian? I can only think of one word: Revenge. I can do it with vengeance. Tons of it. And they'll be freezing when I'm done with both of them. Tasha and Dimitri. We reached her door.

I knocked thrice and a royal guardian opened it and ushered us in. “Rose! Adrian! There you are!” Lissa exclaimed as she made her way to us.

I rushed to hug Lissa. “Hey, Liss! I missed you!”

She smiled as we pulled away, “Me too, Rose!”

I stepped backward from her arms and saw the whole room. Tasha and Dimitri are here. “You didn't tell me you had other visitors, Liss.”

She smiled, “Oh, yes. We had to talk.” I eyed Adrian and he walked beside me, “So, your majesty. What do we have to talk about? It seemed pretty important.”

Lissa just smiled at the title, but nodded and I noticed her green eyes had a glint of satisfaction. I knew it! This was all planned. We ended up sitting. Lissa, Tasha and Dimitri on a velvet couch and me and Ivashkov on a love seat opposite them. Lissa cleared her throat. I loved Lissa being like that. Even she's Queen, she's still the same. Every fiber of her being didn't changed at all. It was like all that changed is that she's the ultimate boss and she had her 'majestic' titles and her full schedule.

“So, Professor Ivashkov was transferred to St. Vladimir's Academy as a resident teacher. And Lady Ozera requested that she'll be in the Academy for some months, along with Guardian Belikov, of course.”

Hell. I'm seeing him everyday.

“Oh, and Guardian Belikov will tutor novices during his stay.” Lissa added.

This was just nice. Very nice.

I nodded, “That's fine with me. I'm staying in the elementary building, anyway.”

Adrian nodded, “Yeah, that would be cool. I'll be teaching Moroi novices, but only the ones who'll specialize with Spirit.”

I noticed Dimitri's eyes on me, so it's time to use some Rose Hathaway remarks. I placed a hand on Adrian's arm, “Of course. You're a great teacher. The greatest teacher I've ever known.” I emphasized the last words to get through the Russian guy. But I knew it wasn't enough.

“I know, little dhampir.” he said as he smirked and winked at me again. I blushed at that. Really blushed.

“So, when will we leave?” Tasha asked, speaking for the first time since Adrian and I came.

“Later afternoon.” I answered the question.

She grinned and gripped Dimitri's hand in hers.

Urgh.

“That would be great!” _Yes, Tasha. I would be very great. Very very great._ I nodded and smirked devilishly. Dimitri frowned. I forgot he knew the meaning of every move I make. Well, this would be very fun and satisfying.

We stood up, and Tasha and Dimitri had to go. They walked outside, holding hands. Aww, how sweet. Ugh. I freaking hate her! Every word that she spat to me was a lie, I know. She's a great actress. And that freaking Dimitri looked at her as if she was glowing or something. His eyes showed awe and fascination. She's not a saint, Dimitri! She's one of those succubus! Wake up!

Once they're gone, I kicked the air in frustration.

“This is not so working, Lissa!”

She sighed, “Soon, it will. Trust me. And he was staring at you earlier.”

I frowned at her. I knew she said that to make me feel better. “No. She's awestruck by that thief!”

Adrian laughed, “Thief, eh?”

I groaned, “Yes! Had a problem with that? She stole Dimitri away from me!”

That made him laugh harder. “What?” I demanded angrily.

“You treat Dimitri like he was a toy or something, little dhampir! It was just hilarious. And the look on your face...priceless!”

Lissa snorted, “It was really quite funny. But seriously, what are you two up to?”

“Revenge,” we said the same time.

“Care to elaborate?” the Queen demanded, placing her hands on her hips.

“Okay,” I started, “We'll start a fake relationship. And wait for Dimitri to beg on my knees. And we make Tasha run away in shame.”

Adrian nodded, “Yep.”

I eyed the guardians by the door and pointed at their direction, “Lissa, will they say anything?”

Lissa shook her head, “Of course not. Oh, and I have to go back. Christian and Crizza would be waiting for me.”

“Right, your majesty.” I said as I swept a gallant bow. Lissa smacked me in the arm, “You're ridiculous.”

She turned to the door and I called her again, “Oh, and one thing: We need tons of refrigerators.” Lissa chuckled, “Isn't it a saying?” I nodded, “Yep. Revenge is best served cold.”

 

_Let's get the party started, Tasha._

 

I threw my backpack inside Adrian's CRV as I sat on the passenger seat. “So, where's Belikov and his lovey dovey? Liss is now on her way back to the her Court. She called me earlier and told me Tasha and Dimitri would be needing a ride with us.”

He grinned, “That would be just perfect.”

Then out of nowhere their figures came to view. Tasha was excited. Dimitri was like a lost puppy and just followed her around. “Time to put the show on, little dhampir.” When they are seated at the back and now comfortable, Adrian hit the engine.

“Oh my God! I haven't seen the Academy in ages!” Tasha exclaimed from behind.

I chuckled, “It's just the same. But there are new teachers and guardians. You'll have fun.”

She squealed as we hit the road, “Aren't you excited, Dimka?” I was dumbfounded when he spoke, “I am. That's been my home once, too.”

I didn't look around even I wanted to see his face. Adrian cleared his throat and placed his other hand on mine. It was warm and kinda reassuring. But most of the time it brought me satisfaction. I felt Dimitri's gaze on our hands. The silence became awkward.

Using my other hand, I turned on the player. It started playing 'Better than Revenge' by none other than Taylor Swift. The song fitted me and my situation perfectly right at this very moment.

 

 _The story starts when it was hot and it was summer_  
And I had it all, I had him right there where I wanted him  
She came along, got him alone, and let's hear the applause  
She took him faster than you can say sabotage

 __  
I never saw it coming, wouldn't have suspected it  
I underestimated just who I was dealing with  
She had to know the pain was beating on me like a drum  
She underestimated just who she was stealing from

 

I started to shake my head back and forth in sync with the song's beat. As the song goes on, everybody seemed to be quiet. I looked at the mirror and revealed that Tasha is now sleeping in Dimitri's arms. And he was stroking her hair gently just like what he used to do to me...I looked away hastily. No. I won't be jealous. Not ever. No way. I let out a sigh. Adrian lessened the volume of the music player.

“Little dhampir, are you okay?” I nodded, “Yep. Thanks for asking, Ivashkov.”

He chuckled, “Just doing my job. And I'm not going to stop asking you if you're okay or not. Swear.”

I smiled at him. _God, he's so good at this._ “I know you're not. So God, help me. The man had just gone overprotective.”

He chuckled and took a left turn. I knew Dimitri was listening to us talk. Like I care! And it's supposed to be that way. He needed to be tortured for everything that he's done. Now, the song was nearly finished.

 

 _I'm just another thing for you to roll your eyes at, honey._  
You might have him, but haven't you heard?  
I'm just another thing for you to roll your eyes at, honey  
You might have him, but I always get the last word...

 

Yeah. That's for Tasha. She might have Dimitri, I'll always get the last word. I just stared at the road idly and woke up from my trance when the car had already stopped. We're here. Back at St. Vladimir's. I opened the door, grabbed my things and rushed outside. Tasha and Dimitri were now outside with her leaning onto him. Whatever.

Adrian locked his car and turned to Dimitri. “Hey, Guardian Belikov. Just ask Guardian Petrov for your room and Lady Ozera's. My little dhampir here and me had to go to bed. We both had classes early tomorrow.” He draped a hand over my shoulder. I didn't react. Why would I? I love Dimitri's expression of mixed shock and anger.

I just smiled sheepishly, “Indeed. We should go back.” Then we started to walk away from them.

 

* * *

 

I walked towards the dorms, humming to myself. I had a very good day myself. Just like the past two years. Waking up, having my classes, doing my job and relax. It's like Tasha and Dimitri never came back. As I pass a couple of novices, I heard a couple of 'yikes' and 'ewws'.

I turned back to them. They must be talking about me or something. Urgh. My sharp glare shut them up. The taller girl was blonde and the shorter was a brunette. So much like me and Lissa back then...

“We're sorry, Professor Hathaway.” I frowned and placed both of my hands on my waist, “So, were you two talking about me?”

They both shook their heads. “I see. What is it about, then? Mind if you share it with me?”

The brunette smiled, “Actually, Professor Hathaway, it's sort of about you. But not about you. It's about your old mentor, Guardian Belikov.” Dimitri? What about him? They must be talking about his abs or something.

I ticked them off, “No. You shouldn't think of him that way. You're a novice. He's a Guardian. Cannot be.”

They both looked disgusted. “It's quite the opposite, Professor.” said the blonde. “The thing is he's hooking up with a hoe.”

Well, let's see about karma, Tasha...

“Did you just said that Lady Ozera is a hoe?”

They giggled and nodded, “She is, Professor Hathaway. She hooks up with almost every Moroi. She just tried to seduce Professor Ivashkov!”

Adrian? And...Tasha? Wait, what? I laughed. I just can't help it!

“Oh, no. You kids stop that. You're saying false information.” I said as I try to regain my composure. The brunette grinned, “That's the thing, Professor! It's real!” She took her iPhone from her pocket and showed me an image. An image of Tasha and Adrian with her hand on his...crotch.

“Oh, my God.” I placed a hand on my mouth in pure shock. “That's impossible.” I tried not to fell on my ass and laugh. What the hell? It's just...eww. Yuck. And hilarous! Now I have something to tease him with. The brunette shoved the iPhone back to her pocket.

“Pardon me, miss. But Tasha Ozera is a blood whore. They even told me she's sneaking off Guardian Belikov's back to offer her services.” she quoted the air.

Whoa. These kids were more updated than I am! That's so...unfair. “Where'd you get that nonsense, young lady?”

“Right from her other guardians” said the blonde. What? Her other guardians? Traitors, huh. That's just karma. I grinned mentally but I gave them a hard glare.

“So, I don't know to what extent of what you told me was the truth. But if I caught the both of you gossiping something that's not true, you know what will happen. Understand?” They nodded enthusiastically and walked off.

I sighed and shook my head. Again, what the hell? Tasha's a bloodwhore? How could Dimitri be so blind about her? Is he really in love with that bitch that it blinded him? Heck, this is the best day of my life so far. I grinned devilishly and walked towards my room.

As I walk by rooms, I heard gasping and moaning from a corridor. What the hell...again? I walked where the sound came from and let my jaw drop to the floor from what I saw. It's Tasha Ozera and Stan Alto. He's against the wall with Tasha pinning him there, using her element. Now Tasha delved lower and lower and lower...I stomped my foot, making a loud noise. Both of them turned to me, with mouths agape. That just proved what the novices had told me.

_Oh, Tasha. You're in so much trouble, baby._

Tasha lost her control and the flames subsided.

“Professor Hathaway!” Stan exclaimed, pulling away from her and straightening his clothes. “You're not telling, are you?”

_Oh. My. God. So Stan really wanted what she was doing to him. This is so epic._

I smirked, “It depends.” And then made my grand-Rose-Hathaway-walkout.

 

* * *

 

 

“Oh, Adrian. You nearly became her victim! Ha!” I teased him as we made our way to the feeders. “You had no idea how shocked I was.”

He snorted, “Little dhampir, at least I'm tougher than Stan.”

Then we both laughed.

“Stan? Tasha? It's just so...impossible!” I giggled and shook my head, “Yeah, right. It is. And Dimitri doesn't have any fucking idea about it!”

“That's it!” he exclaimed.

“What?”

He lowered his voice, “We could make him catch Tasha doing another man.”

I nodded, “Yeah. And the man is you.”

We laughed again as we enter the feeding room. Ah, hell. Tasha's in there. And so was the Russian guy. We sat opposite them as Adrian requested for Alice. Adrian laced his fingers in mine and leaned toward me, “Time to unleash the hell.” he whispered.

I shook my head and grinned. I know I'll have so much fun. Alice walked towards us, “Hello, Professor Ivashkov, Professor Hathaway.”

Adrian grinned, “Hey, Alice.” She sat on his left and leaned toward her. I averted my gaze and it found Tasha straddling Dimitri. Urgh. I wanted to throw up when she smacked her lips on his. I mentally yelled in frustration and anger. I knew my eyes are already bore holes through them.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, “Little Dhampir,” I jumped and looked at him. He smiled sadly as he stood, bringing me along with him. As we exited the feeding room, I felt a tear fell down my cheek.

The pain was beating me...like a drum.

Adrian, being the gentleman that he became, wiped it and looked straight in my eyes. “Revenge, little dhampir, revenge. Remember?”

I nodded. I knew he just used compulsion on me. And I also knew it was for me. Me and our plan.

“Professor Ivashkov!” We spun and saw Alberta.

“Guardian Petrov.” he greeted.

“We need to talk, Professor. About your schedule and everything.” she turned to me, “Hey, Professor Hathaway.”

I grinned at her, “Alberta! Hi!” She smiled, “So, come along, Professor Ivashkov.” She spun and before Adrian followed, he winked at me. I pouted and walked toward my room to do some lesson plan.

“Roza!”

This is what I'm afraid. I fought myself to ignore it. I didn't stopped walking.

The voice became nearer, “Roza, please.” Still, I didn't stop. I felt a strong warm hand so familiar gripped my wrist and spun me around. I was welcomed by pools of brown misery. I struggled not to get drowned in his eyes.

“Unhand me at once!” I heard my voice commanded. It came out hoarse. His grip loosened and he pulled away.

“Roza.” he murmured. I turned my back away from me and stared to walk away but he didn't let me as he blocked my path. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes to avoid his gaze, “Dimitri. I don't want to argue with you. Please let me walk back to my room. I have some business to do.”

“What kind of business?” he inquired. His soft voice tinged with his gorgeous accent echoed the empty corridor.

“Business that does not concern you.” I opened my eyes, “Don't you have some things to do?”

He didn't respond.

“Guardian Belikov, I don't want to be the cause of anything bad. I needed to go back. It's almost three hours before curfew.”

He didn't budge. I nearly screamed in frustration. I frowned at him, “Guardian Belikov, I needed to get back.”

Silence. I can't handle it anymore. Without harning, I punched him square on the jaw, causing him to stumble a little. Ha! He didn't know how much I've improved. Clearly, I am now so much better and powerful than him. Well, all I did for the past years was train and train and train. And all he did was kiss and kiss and kiss Tasha.

I put on my guardian mask, “Let me pass.” He looked at me and moved, caressing the side of his face I hit badly. I walked past him. _Get ready for the next battle, Dimitri Belikov._

 

* * *

 

 

“Hey, you bitch! Get out of there!” I opened one eye groggily and eyed the clock. 4 o'clock P.M. Someone is now trying to rip my door from its hinges! I stomped towards the door, not caring that I'm in my pajamas. I opened the door and revealed the bitch, Tasha Ozera.

“You whore! How dare you to have me gossiped! You had no right!”

Ah, the bloodwhore thingy. Wait! I didn't tell anyone! Except... Adrian.

Great.

“Pardon me, Lady Ozera. But what are you talking about!”

“OH? REALLY? THEN WHY I AM BEING GOSSIPED?” I smirked. My years of anger management training stopped me from hitting her. She's a Moroi. A royal, at that.

“I swear I wasn't the one who caused it. But about me being a bitch, I guess you should have yourself checked. Maybe we're just the same, sister.”

She gripped my shoulders, “THE TIME I FOUND OUT THAT YOU'RE LYING, I'LL BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO KILL YOU.” she threatened.

Ah, she's guilty.

“Oh, Tasha. You know I won't.” I said, dripping my words with much sarcasm.

“YOU BITCH!” she snarled.

“Yeah, you too.” I said calmly, crossing my arms. “I SWEAR, I'LL BURN EVERY PART OF YOU! YOU DESTROYED MY NAME!” she said, gritting her teeth.

Yeah, she's so angry at me. I swear I'll yank Adrian's entrails later.

“It's already destroyed, Tasha. The only difference is nobody knows.”

“YOU FUCKING DEVIL!”

“You know, Tasha. If you're hurt, I'm hurt a million times over. You destroyed your own name all by yourself. I didn't tell you to be a bloodwhore, Tasha. You decided for yourself. Don't blame me. You even took everything from me. My happiness, my heart, my soul. You took Dimitri away from me. And what you are experiencing now was just a part of what I experienced because of you.”

“DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!” she retorted and slapped me.

Hey, I didn't had it coming! That bitch! Still, it's not hard enough. I'm a guardian. I'm tough to bruise with just a simple slap from a whore. “THIS IS ONLY THE BEGINNING, HATHAWAY.”

I laughed without humor. “Right. Now, go stand in the corner and think about what you did.” W

ith that, she stomped away. I shrugged and looked at the corridor. No one heard us.

Good. Yeah, this is only the beginning.

 


	6. Dimitri: That Should Be Me (Justin Bieber)

I walked toward the Queen's office. I needed to explain. I came all the way from Montana to Pennsylvania to tell her all this.

Well, she deserved to know. She's still the bestfriend of the love of my life. I recall what happened the past days. Her hard tone of 'Let me pass.' Her glares, full of anger that crushed my heart into pieces. Tasha's outburst at my Roza's door. Her calm attitude as she countered Tasha's yells and shouts of 'whore' and 'bitch' that is so not her. She used to be reckless and stubborn. And that old Rose would jumped at Tasha and at least try to break her already scarred face. I know I was not myself in days. I can't get a hold of my control.

This is just so agonizing.

Seeing her and seeing how she has changed. What had happened to her? I stopped at the doors of my destination. A memory from yesterday morning came sweeping into me.

_Someone opened my door and closed it with a bang. “Dimitri.” I looked up from my book. It was an angry Tasha by my bed. “You saw what that Rose did to me at her door! You didn't defend me! How could you? You told me you loved me! Why, Dimka?”_

_“I do love you, Tasha. As a brother may love his sister.”_

_She frowned then laughed hysterically, “No! You. Loved. Me! You're joking, right?”_

_I stood up and placed both of my hands on her shoulders, “Tasha. I can't bring myself to love you as you do to me, I wish I can. But no. I couldn't.” S_

_he pushed me away, “That's because you still love that Rose, right?”_

_Now she was crying._

_“SHE HATES YOU, DIMKA! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT? THAT ROSE DOESN'T LOVE YOU!”_

I pushed it all away. Tasha's words stung. A lot. Maybe Rose doesn't love me anymore. I don't care if she does or not. All I know I that still love her so much. And I'll do everything to make her mine again. A royal Guard cleared his throat opened the doors for me. I stepped in.

“Guardian Belikov. I didn't expect you here.” Queen Lissa Dragomir-Ozera said over her office table.

“Your majesty.” I greeted.

“Sit.” she said, gesturing at the velvet chairs by her table.

I obliged.

“So, what is your concern?” the Queen asked.

I looked at her, “Your majesty, I apologize for what happened to Lady Ozera. It's just–”

She raised her had,silencing me. “I know. And I understand her completely.” she placed her hand on the table and continued. “Lady Ozera and Guardians Borovsky went back to London a couple of hours ago. She said you're not her guardians anymore. I assume you already know.”

I nodded, “Yes, your majesty. I was just...guilty. She left because of me.”

Her face was stone hard, just like a queen. “It was hardly because of you, Guardian Belikov. Lady Ozera had done things inappropriate to do in an Academy. Word has reached my ears about this. And it's good of her to leave without being forced to.”

Wow. She really is queen. Hardly the Lissa I knew back then. I could get used to this. She smiled at me. “So, Guardian Belikov. Are you ready to receive your new assignment? Guardians Petrov and Croft had talked to me about this.”

I nodded, “I'm ready, your majesty. I'll never let you down.”

She smiled, “You'll be Professor Ivashkov's sole guardian. He used to have none because he resided in Court, but now that he's in St. Vladimir's he needed guardians.”

WHAT? Oh, no no no! Not him! Anybody but him! Killing hundreds of Strigoi would be damn easier than this.

I know Queen Vasilisa had detected my hesitation. “Is it okay with you, Guardian Belikov? I could assign you to someone else.”

I thought about it. It's Adrian. My mortal enemy. And it's Adrian. The one Rose always spends time with. And I'll do anything to be with her. “No, your majesty. That–that would be great.”

She nodded, “I assume you can work alone?”

I stood up and nodded, “I can handle it just perfect, your majesty. Thank you.” I bowed to her and spun around.

“Guardian Belikov.”

I turned to her, “What can I do for you, your majesty?”

She stood up and walked towards me. My hands became sweaty. “You can do me one favor. Please don't hurt Rose's feelings anymore. She had enough suffering. All you give her was pure pain. She's happy now. I heard she's going out with Professor Ivashkov but I still need a confirmation from her, of course. It's still a rumor but please just stay away from her, if you can.”

_But I can't. I can never can._

I managed to nod, “Yes, your majesty.”

She nodded, “Okay. You may go.”

I bowed again and walked outside. Great. Tasha left me just like that. And I guess it's someone's sick sense of humor that the Queen wanted me to stay away from the love of my life who is now the girlfriend of my charge, Adrian Ivashkov. Just great. I walked towards the parking space. And looked for the car I borrowed from Alberta. An SUV. It's funny how almost all the Guardians here owned SUVs. Some of them owned Civics and CRVs. Honda must be really wealthy by now. I chuckled as I recall the place I parked it. After three rounds of walking around the whole lot, I finally found it. I went inside and started the engine. As I hit the road, I turned the radio on. Country music filled the car and I liked that. I smiled as I recall what Rose said about my taste in music.

_"If you turned off this crap music and put on something that came out after the Berlin Wall went down." I laughed. "Your worst class is history, yet somehow, you know everything about Eastern Europe." "_

_Hey, gotta have material for my jokes, Comrade." Still smiling, I turned the radio dial. To a country station. "Hey! This isn't what I had in mind,"_

I smirked at the memory and turned the radio to a pop station filled with modern music. I wasn't familiar with the song. It was sung by a boy and a...I don't know. It's hard to define if the other singer was a girl or a boy because of the voice. I caught some lyrics, though.

 _You said you needed a little time for my mistakes.  
It's funny how you use that time to have me replaced.  
  
_I gritted my teeth as Adrian Ivashkov penetrated my mind. Does she really loved him? Does she really moved on from me? Does she still love me? It's like some cosmic joke. It's like God spat directly on my face. It's like shit rained on me. And now, everybody's laughing in my mind. I cursed loudly in Russian and took a left. Why is this happening to me? _Because it's your turn to be hurt, idiot!_

I closed the door of the car with a loud bang. I swore under my breath. I really hoped that I didn't break it. As I walked to Guardian Petrov's office, students and Guardians are looking at me. I clenched my hands. I'm sure they're gossiping about me and Tasha. That I lived with a bloodwhore. Hooked up with her. I don't know who claimed that but Tasha blamed Rose. No, she wouldn't do that. Adrian, on the other hand... No. He's a Professor. Cannot be.

Like I care about how students think of me.

But Tasha left me. Well, like I didn't regret my decision since the day I stepped my foot on London. I was grateful to Tasha but...she doesn't 'get' me. I sort of liked that she was far away. There's no pain in my ass anymore. The brick wall that separated me from my Roza was now gone. Replaced by a glass wall that was named Adrian Ivashkov. I could see my Roza now, but still far away from her. I sighed and cursed under my breath. I slowed down my pace as I neared the staff building. I knocked and opened the door of Guardian Petrov's office to see her shocked.

“Oh, Guardian Belikov! I expected you to come by...later. Did you meet the Queen?”

I nodded, “I assume you already received my new assignment?”

She smiled sadly at me and stood. She knew about how much I love my Roza. She gave me a pat on the shoulder like a mother might give me. “Well, maybe they're not really together. Maybe it's just a rumor and nothing else. I know that she still loves you, Dimitri. Rose is...Rose. She's difficult. We all know that. After all she'd experienced the past years emotionally, mentally and physically, no one would be shocked to see if her heart had turned into stone.”

A _nd it's all my fault._

“It's because I left her, right?”

Alberta nodded. “But, Guardian Belikov, if a heart is broken, the only one who'll ever make it whole again is the one who broke it in the first place.”

I nodded. Am I that out of control that I needed advice? But when it comes to my Roza, I'll take anything.

“Does Professor Ivashkov know that I'll be his guardian?”

Guardian Petrov nodded, “Well, of course. In fact, she has spoken to Professor Ivashkov first before speaking to the Headmistress. And Professor Ivashkov is now in his quarters. If not, he's in the library. So, I'll see you around Guardian Belikov. And I wish for your happiness.”

I nodded my thanks and stepped outside and headed towards the library. I heard hushed voices as I opened the door. And there sat on the floor were Adrian and Rose. They were both looking at me, as if caught doing a crime. That confirmed the rumors. They are actually together. If not, what's the meaning of this? I closed the door and stood by it,

“Greetings, Professor Ivashkov. Professor Hathaway.”

Adrian nodded, “Oh, hello, Guardian Belikov. We've been expecting you.”

_Oh, really?_

I nodded and didn't say a thing. Rose was obviously ignoring me and giving every bit of her precious attention to my charge. This is harder than I thought. No, this is beyond cruel. I was snapped back in the bitter reality by Roza's laughter. It's so good to hear her laugh once more but she's laughing because of Adrian. Not me. It should've been me. But all I gave her was just pure pain, as the Queen said earlier. I averted my gaze away from them. I know I'll end up breaking my charge's face if I keep on looking at them. Well, I'm by the door. Unless the Strigoi would be attacking using the windows. And Rose is there with him as a girlfriend and being his girlfriend, an automatic guardian. He had enough protection in the time being.

 _As a girlfriend,_ I thought again. How much pain will fate inflict me? But I needed to be strong. I know this was just a test. I will get through this. We will get through this. And we will be together in the end. A happily ever after. _Our_ happily ever after. I scanned the library thousand times, but my eyes refused to land where Adrian and Rose sat as they talk, read and laugh for like an eternity. That eternity was like living in Hell.

After they spend the time in the library, Adrian and well, me, walked Rose to her room and I watched as they hug and said romantic good nights to each other. Oh, how cheesy. On the way to Adrian's room, my charge and I never spoke to each other. I fought not to rip his throat out. I mentally swore in Russian repeatedly. When he closed his door, he just nodded to me.

I went to bed immediately. Urgh, this is gonna be a long, slow, painful life for me, then. I sat on my bed, and dialled Mama's phone. She answered the second ring. “Dimka! You called! You okay? Are you in Montana already?”

“Yes, Mama. I'm in the states. Tasha isn't my charge anymore.”

“Oh. Is there something wrong, Dimka?”

“My charge is now Adrian Ivashkov. And he and Roza are together now.”

My Mama know everything about me and Rose. I always talk to her about my Roza while in England. How I miss her, how I regret leaving her, how I hate myself and how my love for her had grown despite her absence. Mama said it was true love. That she is mine. Babushka had already dreams about her.

“Oh, Dimka. I'm so sorry. I'm sure she'll realize soon how much the two of you loved each other. And Dimka, you have to fulfil your promise, okay? That you'll bring her here. Okay? I need to go now, Dimka. I love you.”

I smiled despite the tears threatening to spill down. “I love you, too, Mama. I miss you.” And she hung up. I really missed her. Her, Babushka, Viktoria, Sonya, Karolina and Paul. I lay on my bed, thinking about the people I loved the most in this miserable life of mine, as sleep never came to me.

* * *

 

I followed Adrian Ivashkov, my precious rival, class after class. I always stay at the back of the room, scanning every inch of the surroundings, looking for threats. Hour after hour I did the same. Follow him, follow him and follow him yet again. To his class, to the library, to the cafeteria, to the feeders, to his room, to get some fresh air. This man had really changed. The old Ivashkov I knew was merely a scar.

After the seventh hour, Adrian had finished all of his classes. And here comes the hard part: so does Roza. They'll be meeting now. Adrian and I walked towards her classroom at the elementary building. She was sitting on her desk, scrutinizing some papers. Her long elegant dark hail was bound in a high ponytail and she was wearing white long sleeves and black slacks.

Oh, she looked perfect. Too perfect my eyes can't bear to look at her.

“Little dhampir!” Adrian called and she shot up. “Hey, Professor Ivashkov! I didn't expect you here.”

_Oh, really?_

Adrian smirked. Rose piled the papers and placed them on her table neatly. She made her way towards us.

“So, what brings you here?” she asked impatiently.

Adrian's smirk became a grin, “I really wanted to watch a movie with you tonight.”

She frowned, “I am currently busy, Adrian.”

Hell. Yeah. I fought hard not to jab a finger at Adrian's chest and say: HAHA! You lose!

He pouted, “Please, little dhampir! Just in my room!”

She placed a finger on her chin, “I'll think about it. Just promise I get to chose the film.” She said, smiling.

Adrian let out his hand, “Deal.”

Rose shook it, “Deal.”

Well, that's not so bad. It's just a handshake. No romantic moves. Wait, when I get so sensitive about their every move? This is really driving me to madness. Adrian started to walk away and I followed him even though my feet are dragging me where Roza is.

What's happening to me? I'm not sleeping. I'm not eating. I'm not in control. I'm totally out of commotion! What if Strigoi attacked us? I can't be this way, no. I needed to gather myself and get over it! Yes! I'll get over this! We stopped at Adrian's door.

He turned to me, “Guardian Belikov. You can proceed to your room. You're free now. You can do whatever you want to do.”

 _Well, I wanted to strangle you. Oh, shut it, Belikov! He's your charge! Are you crazy?_ I nodded and I paced back to my room. I sat on the bed. I growled in frustration. I HATE THIS! I DON'T WANT THIS ANYMORE! I lay on the bed and let sleep came to me, for the first time in days.

* * *

 

The fucking alarm wake me up.

I stood up and went straight for the shower. Afterwards, I got dressed and went to my charge's room. I was just in time.

Adrian opened the door, “Oh. You're early.”

I nodded, “Doing my job.”

He smirked as we walked towards his first class. “Yes. And can I ask a favor?”

“Anything, Lord Ivashkov.”

“I'm planning to bring my little dhampir on a date. Just here. I don't want to risk a Strigoi attack.”

A date. Yes, a date. “If you can't go with us, I could bring other–”

“No. It's fine with me, Lord Ivashkov.”

Oh, hell no. I won't let Roza out of my sight with his man. Even if it's just here in the Academy. No. Even though how much he's changed, still no. He nodded, “Good. After classes, then. And I prefer you wearing casual clothes. No need to wear guardian uniform.”

I nodded. _Mind if I bring poison with me?_

I followed him again. Again and again. I can't wait for tonight. I will see my Roza all dressed up and having a date with...Adrian Ivashkov. Not me. Yeah, not me. It should've been me. And it's all my doing. Good job, Belikov. Hours and hours pass by like a breeze. Adrian had me waiting on his door while he dress up and all. It's gonna be a long Friday night.

Adrian opened the door and he wore a long sleeved polo shirt and slacks. Nah, he'll never beat my 'duster'. We proceeded to Roza's room and waited. After a couple minutes, she finally opened the door and I swore my jaw hit the floor. She was wearing a red strapless dress with a big red ribbon that reached just above her knees. She had her hair in curls that cascaded down her waist.

She gave Adrian her man-eating smile that should've been for me. Adrian offered his hand and she took it, lacing their fingers. I followed them closely behind. I wondered what would it feels to feel her hands in mine again. I should have been the one who held her hand like that. Adrian had only prepared a small dinner near the cabin. _The cabin._ It brought me some horrible yet pleasant memories. As we reached it, Rose squeezed Adrian's hand in excitement. He took out a chair and let her sit, as a gentleman would before sitting on his own chair.

“Adrian, you don't have to do this.” I heard her say. I walked a few steps far from them, but I can still hear them talking.

“This is so sweet, Adrian. Thank you.” she said as she took a bite. That man sitting across her should be me. That man that reached out and took her hand and mouthed 'I love you' to her should be me. That man that made her laugh and giggle should be me.

This is just...sad. That man who brought her happiness should be me. Adrian Ivashkov should be me, Dimitri Belikov. This is just so wrong! That should be me. And I won't go on with my life until she believed that.

 

 


	7. Rose: What the Hell? (Avril Lavigne)

“Adrian! She's online! Come here now!” I exclaimed.

Adrian got up from his bed and walked over to me on his computer table. He took a chair and sat beside me in front of the LCD Monitor. I was waiting for hours for Lissa in Skype. Hell, our Queen's hi-tech. What else can we do? In minutes, the webcams, microphones and speakers were already set.

“Hey, Liss!” I greeted to her as she appeared. Then Christian came into view, too. “Hey, Perry the Platypus.” I liked to call him that. A character from Crizzie's favorite cartoon, Phineas and Ferb. Well, it suited him well, right? Haha.

He smirked at me, “Hey, Rosie dear.”

I bit my lip, “Sorry about your aunt.”

He nodded, “Ah. She's just that. Don't worry about it, Rosie. She's broken but it's all of her doing. She can fend for herself.”

I smiled sadly. “Thank you for understanding, Christian.”

He just smiled. That man is really good at hiding his feelings.

“So, how's Crizzie?” I changed the topic.

“In her room. Fast asleep. Lissa and I brought her to zoo this morning.”

I smiled, “Glad you're having fun.”

“Yep. And how about the two of you? The progress?” Lissa asked.

“Great.” Adrian said with a grin. “So great. I was laughing my ass off when we got in here.”

I shook my head, “Adrian here invited me to a 'romantic dinner' with him last night.” I said, quoting the air. “And of course, as his guardian, the Russian was there, seeing the whole thing.”

Lissa grinned, “You've got to tell me the whole story, Rose.”

I smirked. “First, Adrian brought me near the cabin and there was a dinner for two. Then, he took my hand, kissed it and confessed his undying love for me. He heard everything.”

Christian shook his head, “You two are mad!”

Lissa laughed, “That was exceptional, Adrian. I can't believe you really do that! I really wish I was there to see his face!”

“It was priceless.” Adrian remarked. “And when we got back here, I was observing him the whole time. His aura was so cool! It was mixed disgust, anger and jealousy. I knew that our plan had worked! The man was pissed!”

“So, so pissed.” I added.

With that, Lissa laughed more and Christian is now grinning. “Then the two of you went to Adrian's room and dismissed him?”

I nodded.

Christian burst out laughing. “So...he got...the... _idea_?”

“What idea?” Lissa asked him.

“ _The idea_.”

I laughed, “Yes. Of course he did!”

He stopped laughing, “Did you two made him?”

Adrian snorted, “Well, when I dismissed him, we still saw a shadow outside the door. So it must be him listening to what are we gonna do. Then, we played my PlayStation all night.”

“With earpieces?” Lissa asked with a grin.

Adrian nodded. “Yep, so that he won't hear the game. And then she started with the frustrated moaning. And I did, too. It was a car racing game so as our cars neared the finish line, little dhampir here started yelling: 'I'm coming, Adrian! I'm coming!' and 'Oh my God, Adrian!' and 'ADRIAN! ADRIAN! FASTER!'” Adrian shook his head as he finish his animated statement.

We all roared with laughter.

Christian's was the loudest, “That...was...epic!”

After we all stopped laughing, that took almost ten minutes, and Lissa was grinning from ear to ear. “I can't believe you two. Seriously. Belikov could have killed himself!”

I was dying to know now what was Dimitri's thoughts when we heard us playing a.k.a. 'doing the dirty deed' as we liked to make him think. Why hadn't he broke down the door? Well, maybe he's to weak and hopeless to see me 'doing that' with Adrian. If that's the case, it would be so cool. And it's better that he didn't broke down the door or else we're busted. And he'll run away in shame. Like Tasha did. Well, she left him because she realized what a jerk that Russian is. And she's right to leave him. I have no reason to be jealous. He had nothing to use to get back at me now.

Poor, poor Dimitri. I wanted to spit on his face and say: 'Take that, loser!' for what he did to me.

Adrian nodded, “Well, he might be up by now. And might be walking his way here. We needed to go.”

Lissa frowned, “Now? What about Rose? Will she get caught?”

“No. I'm not.”

“Good. And I know some club that you two can go tonight. I'll be there. I had the whole club just for us! I had mine and Christian's appointments cancelled. I said, gesturing to my yellow long sleeve blouse and knee-length dark brown skirt. “I brought some things here. Part of the plan.”

Lissa nodded, “You two had planned well.”

A knock on the door in the background startled them. “Okay. We needed to go to. We've been expecting visitors.”

I nodded, “Okay, Liss. We'll update the two of you of whatever plan we might think of. Love you guys.”

She smiled, “Keep up the good work. And I love you guys, too.”

With that, she was disconnected.

I shut down the computer and turned to Adrian, “So what now?”

Adrian stood up and sat on his bed, “We wait for him.”

Then a ridiculous idea popped in my brain. “Come on, Adrian.” I said as I sat next to him on the bed's edge. “We can pretend we are making out.”

He nodded, popping three buttons of his polo. I popped enough buttons to reveal a little of my navy Victoria's Secret lace bra. Adrian run a hand to his hair, effectively messing it. I copied his movement. Then, I heard faint footsteps. Dimitri.

“Adrian! Now!” I whisper-yelled. He buried his face on the crook of my neck and moaned. He's such a great actor. I wonder why he's not in Hollywood by now. I placed a hand on the crown of his neck and moaned. I'm not gonna lie but I kinda liked his breath tickling my neck. I moaned again as he really placed his mouth on my skin. He liked it realistic. He wrapped me in his arms as I straddled him. He growled and moaned loudly. Then, the door bust open. Stood on the doorway was a very pissed off Russian.

 _Mission Accomplished, Hathaway._ And Adrian is now so in trouble.

Poor Ivashkov.

We both broke apart. Dimitri walked in, “Pardon me, Lord Ivashkov. But I wish to speak to Professor Hathaway for a moment. This is important.”

Adrian nodded nervously. In that tone, Dimitri's really terrifying. “Thank you.” he said as he turned and walked towards the door. Adrian looked at me that says: Uh-oh. We're in serious trouble. I just gave him a thumbs up and followed the angry cowboy wannabe.

I followed him quietly. The way we walks in front me said that my logic is not welcome in the conversation we're about to have. I followed him as we exited the building and to the part of the Academy with trees. Here no one would hear us. He turned to me and a second later he had me pinned against a tree. “Roza.” he breathed.

I frowned at him, daring to bore holes in his eyes. “I am not Roza.”

“I know! You're not Roza! Not anymore! You're 'little dhampir' now! But whatever you do, you are still Roza to me!” he yelled, his gorgeous voice with that sexy Russian accent filled with pain and agony. For the first time, I didn't know what to throw back at him. I stayed silent as he spoke again.

“Don't you know what you're doing? Your reputation...”

“My reputation was made over the years, Comrade. This doesn't affect me anymore. And no one was suppose to know about that. And we were in a room.”

He snorted, “You're in a room, yes. But everybody can hear you outside. Does that make any difference?”

I knew he was somehow talking about last night. I smirked, “Well, it's past curfew. No one should be out and therefore, nobody can hear. Except for those who were leaning their ears against doors.”

I felt him stiffen. He really thought he's that stealthy and we didn't know that he's listening. Ha! “Roza...Rose. You don't know what you're doing.”

“I know exactly what I'm doing, Comrade. And why are you giving me these crappy lessons again? I don't need them. I'm not a child anymore.” I manage to get out of the trap of his arms on my sides. We stood face-to-face.

“Roza, no. You're wrong. You're still the same. You're acting immature. You're playing with fire.” he said with the voice that once commanded me to go laps.

“No, I am not. As I said, I'm not that young reckless teenager that you fooled hundred times. The child who melted under your gaze. The young lady who gave in from your touch. The girl who doesn't know what she was doing. The I'm not that Rose you knew. She existed so many years ago. She was just a shadow of what I once was. I'm Professor Rosemarie Hathaway-Mazur. And could you please step out of my way, Guardian Belikov. I have other business to do.”

“Oh. Business. Business in bed with my charge?”

How dare he say that to me?

“What? Don't speak to me like that! And it's none of your fucking business!”

“It's my business, Roza! I care, okay? I CARE.”

“Really? If you really cared, why did you left for London, huh?”

Silence.

“Answer me, Belikov.”

He just stood there like a statue.

“Answer me!”

“I left because I wanted to.” he said quietly.

I can't take it anymore. “Okay, fine. I really got it! Step out my way! NOW!”

“Fine with me, Professor Hathaway. You may go as you please.”

He let me through him without another word. I paced back to the Academy and to my room, wiping any tears that escaped.

 

* * *

 

 

“What are you doing! You're wasting goddamned trees!”

Oh, the nerd just entered my room. Great. I shot him a hard glare as I took another pad paper and tore it into pieces in seconds. I wiped another tear.

“Mmm, let's see...you're tearing everything that's made of paper that you laid your eyes on. WHY?”

I had to answer him. I sniffed, “To hear the sickening sound of what Dimitri Belikov did to my heart. Again.”

He got down to my level as I was sitting on the floor. “Little dhampir, mind a little trivia? Hearts are absolutely not made of paper.”

I smacked his arm, “ADRIAN!”

He stood up as I got a new sheet, “Right! I already got the symbols! But I guess you're kinda right. Muscles are tissues. And tissues can be–”

He's so annoying!

“ADRIAN!”

He put his arms up in defeat. “Okay, okay! Just want to calm you down, litte dhampir! Easy!”

I frowned as I tore another one, “You're not helping! You're annoying me! Just think what we have to do next.”

He shook his head, “Just tell me what happened earlier.”

With that, his words came to me.

_“I left because I wanted to.”_

A tear fell down and I quickly wiped it with my arm. “He told me how immature I am. And that he left with Tasha because he really wanted to. He wanted to leave me, Adrian! He wanted to!” I yelled at him.

“And what did you say?”

“I told him to step out of my way. I told him that I'm not the girl he used to know. I told him I'm not his Roza.”

“What? Why did you do that, Rose?” Adrian chastised me. When he didn't called me as 'little dhampir', he's really mad. But I just frowned at him, “What? You want me to tell him everything?”

“Why not?”

“Why would I need to tell him what happened? He doesn't deserve to know!”

“Yes, I know! But if you can only see his aura! It's full of regret!”

“No! This is making me happy. I wanted to get revenge. I don't care if he loves me or he hates me! What the hell, Adrian!” I stood up and started to pace around my room. After what I said to him, Adrian and I didn't see Dimitri at all. That bastard.

“Rose! He's sorry. We should really stop this. I mean it.”

“No way.”

“Yes. I can see your aura, too. You still love him.”

“NO!”

“Really? Auras lie now? I don't think so. Forgive him, little dhampir.”

What? No. Never. He brought me much pain that it blurred the possibility of me forgiving him. And we needed to finish what we had started. There's no going back now. Get ready for the party, Adrian. Bring Belikov with you.”

“No.”

“What?”

“I said no.”

“No? Adrian! I was dead because of him! He killed me!” He closed his eyes for a moment and nodded, “Okay, we'll go. But promise you'll tell him what actually happened. Everything. Your deadline is at the end of this month. You have two weeks, little dhampir.”

He reached out his hand and I shook it, “Deal.”

He nodded, “Then get ready. I'm getting Belikov.” I nodded as he left me alone in my room.

I rushed to the bathroom. My God! My eyes are puffy from crying and my hair's a mess. I stepped into the shower and let the water ease and calm me down.

_“Rose! Snap out of it! You are strong! You can do this!”_

_Lissa's words._

_“Rose! Come on! You can do better than that! Or are you saying that I'm wrong? Christian Ozera is never wrong, Hathaway.”_

_Christian's remarks._

_“_ _Auntie Rose? You okay? I'm here for you.” Crizzie's reassurance._

_“Little dhampir! Look at me! I'm good now! You should be too!”_

_A_ _drian's comments._

“ _Kiz, you are Zmey's daughter. You can face whatever crap life throws at you. It's in your blood.”_

_Abe's brags. “_

_You are Guardian. You're duty lies elsewhere. Not in your heart always. Do your job well. They come first.”_

_Mom's mantras._

_Their love. All of them. They made me who I am now._

Not a love of some Russian guy that just killed me. Well, a love like that always hurt. Whether it's right or wrong. And now, all I wanted is to mess around. And I'm thinking: What the hell?

I stepped out of the shower. I pulled out my green spaghetti-strap cocktail dress and black fishnet stockings out of my wardrobe and got dressed. Then I started styling my hair. I got it up in a ponytail and I let some curls cascade the sides of my face. I put on my belt and placed a silver stake. Just to make sure.

Lissa and a lot of Moroi are coming. We don't know what can happen there. With another glance at the mirror, I walked outside. Time to meet Ivashkov and have some fun.

 

* * *

 

“Little dhampir! Amazing, as usual.” he commented. I gave him my man-eating smile as I walk toward him at the lot.

“You look good too, Ivashkov.” He nodded and gestured for me to follow him to his car. “So, what shall we do?”

“Same old. Make him jealous.”

Adrian raised an eyebrow, “Really? I guess we should piss him off, too. I kinda liked seeing him angry.”

I ticked him off, “You have no idea what you're saying. He's terrifying.”

“He amuses me,” Adrian remarked.

I chuckled.

“Belikov.” Adrian called to the figure walking toward his car. He turned around and...wow. His shoulder-length brown hair were framing his face, hanging loosely and he's in his duster. He really looked like a cowboy, minus the hat and the horse.

Adrian cleared his throat, “The keys.”

Dimitri took the keys from Adrian's palm and entered the car, slamming the door loudly. “Both of you are drooling at each other, little dhampir.” Adrian said, chuckling.

I really hoped Dimitri didn't heard that from the inside. I just shook my head, opened the back door and entered the car as Adrian followed me. As Adrian closed the door, Dimitri opened the engine and in seconds, we hit the road. “Yee-ha!” Adrian yelled beside me, like a cowboy.

I looked at him with my 'Don't do anything stupid!' look. He shrugged and grinned. Can he read minds? I hope not. I rolled my eyes and turned to the window as I watched buildings pass me by.

 _“But if you can only see his aura! It's full of regret!”_ Adrian's voice whispered in my mind.

Can I really forgive him? Is Adrian telling the truth? Do I still love Dimitri? I sighed. Then my ears were filled by Lady GaGa's voice.

 

_Ohh-ohh-ohh... Caught in a bad romance_

_Ohh-ohh-ohh... Caught in a bad romance_

_Ra-ra-raaaah_

_Roma-romama_

_Gaga-ooh-la-la_

_Want your bad romance_

_Ra-ra-raaaah_

_Roma-romama_

_Gaga-ooh-la-la_

_Want your bad romance_

 

_I want your ugly_

_I want your disease_

_I want your everything as long as it's free_

_I want your love_

_Love-love-love_

_I want your love_

 

“Really, Adrian? Lady GaGa? I don't know you're a fan. You had me there. Seriously. I didn't know you like those type of artists. Well, now I'm not alone.”

He heard Dimitri's chuckle from the driver's seat.

_Oh, that voice! I missed that voice! What am I thinking? Shut it, Rose!_

I turned to Adrian who just shrugged, “Just sing along, little dhampir! I know you love her!” And then he started singing along. Well, he can sing but not that much. “I want your love and I want your revenge! You and me could write a bad romance! Oh-oh-oh-ohh! I want your love and your lover's revenge, you and me could write a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Caught in a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Caught in a bad romance!”

I smiled and started to sing. “Ra-ra-raaaah! Roma-romama! Gaga-ooh-la-la! Want your bad romance! I want your aura, I want your design! 'Cause you're a criminal as long as you're mine! I want your love! Love-love-love! I want your love!”

“See? That wasn't so bad, little dhampir. You're not a good of a singer, but you hit the notes just fine.”

“Stop being a bitchy geek for a second, will ya?”

He smiled. “Okay! Now, let's sing!” We started a duet. “I want your love and I want your revenge! You and me could write a bad romance! Oh-oh-oh-ohh! I want your love and your lover's revenge you and me could write a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Caught in a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Caught in a bad romance! Ra-ra-raaaah! Roma-romama! Gaga-ooh-la-la! Want your bad romance!”

Now, we are shaking are heads and singing at the top of our lungs. I didn't care if Dimitri's paying attention or anything. Then, I had my solo with the song, “Work! Work! Fashion, baby! Work it! Move that, bitch crazy! Work! Work! Fashion, baby! Work it! Move that, bitch crazy! Work! Work! Fashion, baby! Work it! Move that, bitch crazy! Work! Work! Fashion, baby! Work it! I'm a free bitch, baby!”

I faced Adrian who just looked at me like I'm a patient from a Mental Hospital and I knew he knew that I'm singing the song out of my feelings for the damn Russian, “I want your love and I want your revenge! I want your love! I don't want to be friends! I don't want to be friends! I don't want to be friends! I don't want to be friends! Want your bad romance! Want your bad romance!”

Then, he joined me once again, “I want your love and I want your revenge! You and me could write a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! I want your love and your lover's revenge! You and me could write a bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Want your bad romance! Caught in a bad romance! Want your bad romance! Ohh-ohh-ohh! Want your bad romance! Caught in a bad romance! Ra-ra-raaaah! Roma-romama! Gaga-ooh-la-la! Want your bad romance!”

The song finished and Adrian's cheering for me, “Woah, little dhampir! You rocked the car! What more when we're at the club already! Promise me you'll sing, okay!”

I chuckled, “Only if you stay sober enough.”

He smiled, “Well, I'm not much of a drinker anymore, and you know that.”

I laughed, “Right. And you're not carrying the awful scent of cloves anymore.”

“Yup. Replaced by the scent of you.”

That signaled the start of our act. I giggled like a schoolgirl. “Right. You carry my scent anywhere.” Then we are thrown to one end of the car. Dimitri had stopped the car with a strong brake and killed the engine.

“We're here!” he called, voice hoarse. He cleared his throat and called again, “We're here!”

“Okay.” Adrian said as he opened the door, letting me and him slip outside. It's dark now and the party's already started. Dimitri got outside too and pocketed the keys. I noticed that he had brought his stake, too. Well, he's Adrian's guardian. Reluctant guardian, as Adrian and I call it. He's doing his duty but without the will to do it. Nice.

We entered the club and it was full of Morois and dhampirs already. Loud music, bright lights, dancing and drinking. With her Moroi eyes, Lissa spotted me immediately. She ran and hugged me, “Oh, Rose! I missed you!” She broke away, “You look beautiful.”

“Well, so do you. Even as queen.”

She smiled, “Really?”

“Really.”

And then we laughed. _Oh, how I missed the old times! When we were just students at St. Vladimir's. The jokes, the movies, the pranks, everything. When life was just simple. When it was just the two of us, without all the complications of life._

Well, we can't bring it back anymore, can we? I really wish I could. “Rose? What's wrong?” Lissa asked. I didn't notice I was already tearing up and there were now tears on my cheeks.

“I'm fine, Liss. Just remembering the time when we were just kids. Look how emotional I turned out to be!”

She smiled sadly and nodded, tears in her eyes. “Yeah. I missed that days too, Rose. I wish we could relive them.”

“Okay, okay! What's with all the commotion! Party, people!” I heard Christian say as he stood beside his wife. I wiped the tears and smiled, “Let's get the party started, Christian.”

“The party's already started, Rosie.”

“No parties are called 'parties' without Rose Hathaway.”

Christian shook his head, “Same old Rose.”

“Um, Rose. Can you please excuse us?”

I nodded, “Sure, Liss. See you around.”

When they're gone, Adrian offered me his arm and I took it. In the corner of my eye, Dimitri had taken his post by the wall. Reluctant Guardian.

We reached the tables and sat. We didn't talk for minutes. Why? Adrian's not like that. I noticed he's looking at something, or rather someone. I followed his gaze and saw the most unexpected person I could see: Sydney Sage.

I grinned devilishly. Sydney's beautiful, kind, helpful and loyal. She's an Alchemist. And she doesn't like us much. Maybe that can change? She was sitting at the far side of the room, alone. I placed my palm in front of Adrian's face and waved, “Earth to Ivashkov!”

“What?”

“You're staring.”

He turned to me, “What? No!”

“Oh, really?” I stood up. “I'm getting her.”

He stood up, too, and grabbed my arm. “Wait! You know her?”

Why did he exactly knew who it was I was going for? Well, our Adrian has been smitten by a human. That's official.

I turned to him, “Of course I know her! She's Sydney. She's an Alchemist. She helped me when I was...in Siberia. You already met her. When we bust Victor Dashkov out of prison.”

“I know. I met her while I was in Italy.” he slumped back on his chair.

“What?”

“Don't get her, okay! She can bring back unwanted memories.”

I grinned. This time, I wanted to give Adrian his own happiness, considering everything he did for me. And he deserved to be happy, seeing how he had changed in the past years.

“What memories?”

He pouted, “Your memories with her. Mine was...beautiful.”

I smirked, “What happened to you in Italy, may I ask? You never told me a single thing about it”

“Well, I saw her in a museum. I recognized her and we spoke to each other and spend a lot of time together and then the Alchemists called her out of nowhere and dragged her out of Italy. I never spoke to her since.” he muttered.

Look who's in love! I can't believe Adrian never told me this!

“Well, this is the time to speak to her again.”

“I doubt that.”

Without a single glance at him, I walked towards her. She's looking down at her empty glass, lost in thought. Of course she didn't notice me until I spoke.

“Hey, Sydney.”

She shot up immediately and hugged me, “Rose!”

“Hey, didn't expect you here.” She smiled, “Well, the Queen invited me. How could I say no? And, Abe forced me.”

I laughed, “Abe, as usual. Oh, and there's someone who wanted to talk to you.”

“Who?”

I grabbed her by the arm and brought her to our table. “Adrian!” she greeted. I sat beside him as he grinned his biggest grin, the one I rarely see plastered on his face.

“Little Alchemist!” She sat beside him as I looked around, looking for Dimitri, but I couldn't see him but I felt his gaze on us. How can I put my 'Adrian + Sydney = Love' mission if he's watching us all the time?

Urgh.

I leaned closer to Adrian's ear. “Belikov's eyes are on us. I could feel it.”

He nodded, “Of course. He's guarding me.” he whispered back.

I turned to Sydney, “So, you two spend some time in Italy, huh?”

She blushed, “Oh. Yeah.”

Adrian ignored me. “Little Alchemist?”

“Yes?”

Oh, just look at the way they look at each other! They looked cute together. Seriously.

“So, yeah, I just wanted to go out with you sometime, like a date.”

She laughed, “Sorry. I don't go out with the evil creatures of the night, remember? I was just brutally forced to go here.”

His face fell, “Just one time, please, little Alchemist?”

She bit her lip. I remember she called him 'cute' once. Oh, this is fun.

“Okay. Just one time.” He grinned and his eyes shone, “And I promise, you'll come back for more.”

“Let's see about that.”

I cleared my throat, “I'll get some drinks, okay?”

They both nodded and I stood up, giving them space.

 

* * *

 

I reached the exit, two huge men in black suits with matching tinted sunglasses were watching me as I stepped outside the bar, the night zephyr welcoming me. I found a spot with great distance, but not so far, that I could still monitor any Strigoi lurking around the perimeter.

I hugged myself, breathing the air. The music coming inside the building was just barely a whisper.

 

 _All my life I've been good, but now_  
I'm thinking 'What the hell?'  
All I want is to mess around  
And I don't really care about  
If you love me, if you hate me,  
You can't save me! Baby, baby!

 

“Rose? Roza?” That voice. Again. Urgh. Then I heard footsteps. His footsteps. What the hell! He's coming after me. Was he guarding Adrian? He's now close, I could feel his breath on the nape of my neck. I didn't face him.

“Didn't you have a Moroi to guard?”

“I do. But Roza–”

I turned around to face him and spat, “But Roza what?”

Oh, I'm tired of this. So, so tired.

“He's flirting with someone else! Can't you see that?”

“So?”

He frowned, “So? He's your boyfriend, for God's sake! And you let him flirt with another in front of you! Are you so in love with him that in blinded you?”

Well, it's nice to know that all this time, he really believed Adrian and I are actually together. Ha! He's a fool. I crossed my arms, “Are you Rose Hathaway?”

He blinked, “No.”

“Yes, that's right. You're not Rose Hathaway. You can't tell me what to do with my life.”

“Rose!” he chastised.

“What?”

He's really annoying me! Argh! He suddenly grabbed my wrists. “I know you know all the right things to do, but why are you not doing it?”

I tried and failed to escape from his grip. He's too strong, stronger than the Dimitri years ago.

“Because I want to do whatever I wanted to do, regardless what's right or wrong.” I said as calmly as I could.

“That's nonsense.” He said, his hands still wrapping my wrists.

“Dimitri, what's the point of all this?”

“You have to do the right thing.”

“What right thing?”

He didn't answer me. “What right thing, Comrade?” I asked again.

Silence.

“Answer me.”

He tighten the hold on my wrists, but he never did say anything. I rendered him with no comebacks! Point for Hathaway.

“Well, I see. You don't want me with Adrian, do you?”

Still no answer.

“You're jealous?”

With that, he slowly loosened his grip and finally, let my wrists dangle at my sides. Bingo. And then the next thing I knew is my lips was crushed against his.

Oh, how I missed it! HATHAWAY! STOP IT RIGHT NOW!

I pulled away and pushed him hard. Even though I wanted to stay like that forever, I needed to do what I had just did.

“What the hell, Guardian Belikov!” I practically yelled.

“I'm sorry, I was just carried away.” he said, voice hoarse.

“Carried away? Carried away? You're a guardian. I'm a teacher. We don't have words like that on our vocabulary.”

He opened his mouth to speak but I interrupted him, “I don't need your explanation, Guardian Belikov. I've heard too much of it. I don't care if that's intentional or accidental. Just don't do it again.”

He nodded.

I took several steps towards the bar but he caught grip on my upper arm, “I still love you, Roza. Let me save you from the chains of the past.”

Well, sorry, Dimitri. You hurt me too much. I can't let you.

I turned to him, “Well, maybe I just want to mess around. I don't really care if you love me or if you hate me. You can't save me.” I looked at the hand that send sparks up my arm, “What the hell. Let go of me.”

He obliged. And I walked away from him, again. What the hell just happened?

 

 


	8. Dimitri: Dear Angel (April Sixth)

Sitting, I stared my fixed luggage. I'm leaving tomorrow. It seemed that they needed some professional guardians in Russia. Guardian Croft had called me yesterday to inform me that. Not to make me leave, but to recommend other guardians. Well, I had recommended myself, but he said I am most needed here at St. Vladimir's. I insisted that I'm good to go so he had no choice but to agree, considering everything that has happened since I got here. But I have hopes that my Roza would not let me leave. I guess that would only happen in my dreams now. I didn't even notify my charge about it. I planned to leave without telling them. They are happy. So, so happy that they won't notice that I'm gone. Well, it's been six days since the night at the club, but the memory is burned in permanently in my mind.

 

_She crossed her arms, “Are you Rose Hathaway?”_

_I blinked, “No.”_

_“_ _Yes, that's right. You're not Rose Hathaway. You can't tell me what to do with my life.”_

_“Rose!” I chastised her. She must listen to me. Just this once!_

_“What?”_

_I grabbed her wrists, the quick movement surprising her, preventing her to pull away._

_“I know you know all the right things to do, but why are you not doing it?”_

_She tried and failed to escape from my grip. Am I really the devil I see in her eyes? Did I really caused her enough pain that she hated all of me?_

_“_ _Because I want to do whatever I wanted to do, regardless what's right or wrong.”_

_“That's nonsense.” I said, trying to bring out answers I long for._

_“Dimitri, what's the point of all this?”_

_“You have to do the right thing.”_

_“What right thing?”_

_Right thing? You should be with me, Not Adrian. Not anybody. Me. Only me._

_“What right thing, Comrade?” She asked again. I gave her silence._

_“Answer me.”_

_I tightened the hold on her wrists, letting myself believe that she's real._

_“Well, I see. You don't want me with Adrian, do you?”_

_Still silence. She's smart enough to figure out everything._

_“You're jealous?”_

_Bingo. With that, I let my grip slip away. My hands ached. My whole body ached. For her. Only for her. Then I did the wrong thing to do. I presses my lips against hers and for a while, I was in heaven._

_STOP IT RIGHT NOW! My head screamed. NO! This was meant to be! My heart had replied._

_She pulled away and pushed me hard. “What the hell, Guardian Belikov!” She yelled._

_“I'm sorry, I was just carried away.” I reasoned. A very lousy one._

_“Carried away? Carried away? You're a guardian. I'm a teacher. We don't have words like that in our vocabulary.” She said._

_I opened my mouth to tell her she's right and I'm sorry, but she held her hand up to stop me._

_“I don't need your explanation, Guardian Belikov. I've heard too much of it. I don't care if that's intentional or accidental. Just don't do it again.”_

_I could only nod. She started to walk toward the bar but I immediately caught her arm. I need to tell her. “I still love you, Roza. Let me save you from the chains of the past.”_

_My heart pounded in my ears as I waited her answer._

_“Well, maybe I just want to mess around. I don't really care if you love me or if you hate me. You can't save me.” She looked at the hand–my hand–that was keeping her in place with disgust, “What the hell. Let go of me.” I let her go._

 

 _Again._ That memory made me wonder: When does she plan on talking to me about everything that has happened to her? I sighed as I got up. I'm not leaving just yet. Just. Yet.

* * *

 

“Dimitri? You're here for what?” Alberta asked me from her desk, as usual.

“Picking up my assignment for the day.”

“Oh.” she said, confused.

Why does she sounded so shock? And why do people act so strange near me? Do I have a huge mole on my face that made them uncomfortable?

“What about Professor Ivashkov?” she asked me politely.

“He's with another guardian at the library. He told me to do something else the whole day.”

She nodded in understanding. She opened a drawer at her side and pulled out a long folder. She examined it before turning to me. “It seems the only job available at this moment is a room assignment at the elementary building in Rm. 15. And a midnight patrol later this evening. Are you okay with those, Guardian Belikov?”

Anything that can made my Roza out of my mind is okay. I nodded, “Yes, Guardian Petrov. Thank you.”

She smiled warmly as I turn around and exited her office and headed to the elementary building.

 

_I can't take this anymore. Then all I heard was the door being opened and Roza was straddling my charge. I entered the room, taking all my power not to rip the man in pieces with my bare hands._

_“Pardon me, Lord Ivashkov. But I wish to speak to Professor Hathaway for a moment. This is important.” I said, my voice sounded very far away._

_Adrian nodded nervously. I knew I sounded really terrifying._

_“Thank you.” I murmured, nodded at him and quickly went out. I don't know what I might do if I stayed in there a second more. I didn't look back. I heard her following me quietly, no wit remarks. I walked toward the part of the Academy full of trees. Here no one would hear us. I turned to her and I lost all my sanity._

_I had her pinned against a tree._

_“Roza.” I breathed._

_She frowned, “I am not Roza.”_

_“I know! You're not Roza! Not anymore! You're 'little dhampir' now! But whatever you do, you are still Roza to me!” I yelled. I don't care if I'm a guardian. This was killing me. Well, where do I start to express how I feel? How much this love had blinded me? How much I wanted to end my life right now so that I won't feel the pain any longer._

_“Don't you know what you're doing? Your reputation...”_

_“My reputation was made over the years, Comrade. This doesn't affect me anymore. And no one was suppose to know about that. And we were in a room.” she spat._

_Well, maybe she had. And hers it's a good one. Well, she's not an ex-strigoi. But I just want her away from any kind of harm, whether physically, mentally or emotionally. Still, what she did last night had killed me. With that, she confirmed her love for Ivashkov. She gave me a proof of how far she'd gone without me. She tore me apart._

_I snorted, “You're in a room, yes. But everybody can hear you outside. Does that make any difference?”_

_Yes, I heard them. Loud and clear. Every sound was like Thor's hammer. And it hit my heart everytime._

_She smirked, “Well, it's past curfew. No one should be out and therefore, nobody can hear. Except for those who were leaning their ears against doors.”_

_Busted. Did they really caught me eavesdropping even if they're doing the deed? It's Roza, she notices everything. I felt myself stiffen. This was agony._

_“Roza...Rose. You don't know what you're doing.”_

_“I know exactly what I'm doing, Comrade. And why are you giving me these crappy lessons again? I don't need them. I'm not a child anymore.”_

_She managed to get out of the trap of my arms. We stood face-to-face._

_“Roza, no. You're wrong. You're still the same. You're acting immature. You're playing with fire.” I said with the voice that once commanded her to go dozen laps._

_“No, I am not. As I said, I'm not that young reckless teenager that you fooled hundred times. The child who melted under your gaze. The young lady who gave in from your touch. The girl who doesn't know what she was doing. The I'm not that Rose you knew. She existed so many years ago. She was just a shadow of what I once was. I'm Professor Rosemarie Hathaway-Mazur. And could you please step out of my way, Guardian Belikov. I have other business to do.”_

_THAT HURT. Seriously. Every word pierced my soul like poisoned arrows._

_“Oh. Business. Business in bed with my charge?”_

_I know that was very inappropriate to say but I was not in control right now._

_“What? Don't speak to me like that! And it's none of your fucking business!”_

_Don't you know how many times I wished it wasn't my business? Don't you know how badly I wanted to stay out of your life? But I can't!_

_“It's my business, Roza! I care, okay? I CARE.”_

_“Really? If you really cared, why did you left for London, huh?”_

_Silence. Dead silence. I can't answer that._

_“Answer me, Belikov.”_

_I_ _stood there, like a statue. There was something wrong in me that day. I don't know what. I have never known what. And I had hurt my Roza for not knowing the reason._

_“Answer me!”_

_“I left because I wanted to.” I murmured, saying the words before I stopped them. Did I really wanted to leave her? For Tasha?_

_“Okay, fine. I really got it! Step out my way! NOW!” she yelled._

_That was scary. Really._

_“Fine with me, Professor Hathaway. You may go as you please.” I said._

_My whole system was screaming: HE DOESN'T MEAN THAT! STAY! DON'T LEAVE! I let her through me without another word. As I watched her half-pace and half-run back to campus, tears were already cascading down my cheeks._

 

Loud cheering from a room broke me out of it.

I didn't realize that I had stopped walking. I stood on an empty corridor leading to Rooms 10 to 15. I sighed. I'm a Guardian. I just can't let my feelings just take over me like that. I need to protect. They come first. I put on my Guardian face and started to walk towards the farthest room. I stopped at a closed door with a big 'Room 15' sign placed on the door. I knocked thrice opened the door...just to see what I was dreading to see.

This was Roza's classroom. And I'm gonna watch her teach. Crap. Now how am I suppose to stay away from her? I looked at the children in the room – both Moroi and dhampir – as they looked back at me with their little scared reactions. Rose looked surprised, too. Oh, my Roza.

Then one of her students started to bawl. A Moroi boy that looked a lot like Christian. This is not good. Rose bit her lip and gathered the scared boy in her arms, making soothing noises and rubbing little circles in his small back. “No, it's gonna be okay. He's not scary, little one.” she murmured.

The boy nodded and wiped his eyes with his sleeve. Rose straightened up and looked at me, along with the rest of her class. A few awkward seconds passed by until she cleared her throat. “Um, class. This is Guardian Dimitri Belikov. He'll be...uh...guarding this class for the hour. Right, Guardian Belikov?”

I nodded.

“Good morning, Guardian Belikov!” the class greeted me in unison. Rose had taught them well. I never thought my Roza, the most stubborn and rule-breaking student I met, would be such a perfect teacher. I'm just glad she didn't adapted her teaching techniques from Stan. I took my guardian place at the back of the room. The kids were still eyeing me. What the hell? And...they were smiling.

Rose sighed, “Um, kids. Please pay attention. And staring is sometimes rude.”

“Sometimes?” chimed a brunette girl from the left side of the room. “Sometimes. Because in some cases, you just can't help it.”

That earned a ton of giggles from them. Rose knew how to make them laugh. I wonder what our child would look like? Wait...what? We're dhampirs! We can't have children! But Lissa had organized an orphanage at Court...

NO! I'm not even sure if she still loved me! She might even marry Ivashkov! I shook the thought out of my system and started to listen and watch Rose teach.

“...that you are future guardians...” she said to the kids at her left, “and they always comes first. No exceptions. Don't let your feelings get the best of you.” And then she turned to the Moroi children at her right. “And you are Moroi. Make your families be proud of you. Do the right things. And trust your guardians. They will never let you down.” They nodded.

Well, well. Who's giving the Zen lessons now, my oh so lovely Roza? I chuckled silently. Rose noticed it.

“Guardian Belikov? Do you want to add something?”

Uh-oh. Busted. I cleared my throat. “Nothing more, Professor Hathaway. Very well said.”

She nodded and continued speaking with the constant waves and sways of her hands.

A couple of minutes passed, and then the bell rang. One hour already? Ouch. Now, I have to get out of here before I could kiss the teacher in front of her class. I got out of the room before anybody did and started to pace towards my room for a quick shower. The whole hour in the same room as her and seeing her teach was both happy and sad. Sad, because I had made her a shell of the Rose before. What I did (whatever it is, because I have no idea) had made her a totally different person. Happy, because I got to see what she had become. What my Roza had become without me. A much better version of her. More refined and more controlled. I reached my room and walked straight into the shower.

* * *

 

I made my way outside the building to start patrolling the grounds. I met Guardians Petrov and Castile at the school grounds. “Guardian Belikov.” I nodded, “Guardian Castile. Guardian Petrov.” She nodded, “How's Rose's class today, Dimitri?” she asked me. Not this. Ask me anything, but definitely not this. “Her c-class is good. Very, very good.” I stammered out. This was so embarrassing! Alber–Guardian Petrov grinned, “I see, Guardian Belikov. I see you're more adept at guarding a class than a Moroi. With your approval and Professor Ivashkov's permission, we would transfer you to guarding elementary classrooms permanently.” WHAT? This is not good... Dimitri find a way out of this! NOW! “Uhm...I don't think Professor Ivashkov would give me up as his–” Guardian Castile smiled and cut me off, “Professor Ivashkov had already given his approval earlier this day when we told him our wishes.” “I'm sorry, Guardian Castile, but I plan to co back to Russia.” “Oh.” Guardian Petrov said. “When do you plan to go home?” “I have packed my bags, as Professor Ivashkov had given me up as his guardian, I see no reason for me to stay.” “Why won't you mentor novices again? Just like with Professor Hathaway?” Eddie asked me. Because I will just remember all of the times I spent with Rose and fell in love with her all over again. “I'm sorry but I was needed back home. And maybe I can get an assignment at St. Basil's.” Both of them considered this. The nodded, “If that's what you wanted, Guardian Belikov, you may go as you please.” Eddie stated. “But, remember what you are about to let go.” added Alberta. I knew instantly what is she talking about. Rose. But she's no longer mine so I don't have anything to let go. I have nothing. If I stay here longer, I would just do things I know I will regret sooner or later. And I'm just ruining Roza's life with Ivashkov here. So I'm now going out of the picture. Forever. After we patrolled the Academy's grounds in awkward silence, we finally parted ways. I went to the parking lot after getting my bags. Guardian Castile would be dropping me off the airport as he was leaving for another assignment. We were walking to his car when we heard voices. One boy and one girl. “Adrian! What are you doing?” asked the girl. Her voice. It's not Rose's. Not even close. “You're the only girl I truly wanted, Sage.” he replied. Kill me now. How about Rose? But then I remembered who the girl was. Sage. Sydney Sage. The Alchemist. Eddie and I walked towards the sound. He had her by the arm. “Adrian, I have no time for this. And that's not even proper! Don't do it again, please!” He groaned and pulled her to him. “Please, Sydney. I need you.” No way. Isn't he dating my Roza? And he's not drunk. There's no excuses. He's totally cheating on her! How could he? My Roza doesn't love me anymore because of a man who just uses her! I can't let this pass! I started to walk toward them when Eddie stopped me. “We must go, Guardian Belikov. We might disturb them.” “But he's cheating on Professor Hathaway!” Eddie looked confused. “But he wasn't with her, Guardian Belikov. He never was.” Wow. This man is not so updated. “Let's go.” I nodded, “You can go, Guardian Castile. I have something to do before I go. I'll just catch a ride with other Guardians. Thank you.” I said politely. He nodded and walked away. Well, I walked away, too. Towards Rose's room or anywhere else she could be. I replayed what I had witnessed at the parking lot in my mind. Yuck. Adrian's cheating on my Roza with an Alchemist? No. The girl doesn't want him the way he wanted her. It's just him. This was not Sydney's fault. I stopped in front of her room and slowly, knocked. I heard her footsteps neared the door and the knob turning... “Guardian Belikov.” she greeted coldly. She had her guardian face on so that I couldn't guess what's really her reaction upon seeing me on her door. “I need to talk to you. In private.” She sighed and let me in. She closed the door behind her and crossed her arms, “Are you going to say sorry again, Dimitri? Well, get on with it and leave. Whatever you do, that statement won't buy me.” I shook my head, “No. I was going to tell you that your lovely boyfriend of yours is cheating on you. CHEATING ON YOU.” I raised my voice so that she could hear me properly. But her face still showed no emotion. “That's what you're gonna say?” “Can't you see? It's Adrian Ivashkov! Cheating on you!” She frowned, “That strategy, would never buy me, too. If you're planning to make me believe some lies so that I could be with you again, stop. Not gonna work.” Would she just open her eyes for a second and see the reality in front of her? “Roza. I'm not trying to win you back this time. I just want you to know the truth.” “Truth? Do you, Guardian Belikov, have any idea what the truth is?” I sighed, “You never did tell me.” Well, that was true. “Really? Do I have to tell you the truth if you already know it?” Already know what? I racked my brain for anything in the past years. England. Tasha. Josh. Miley. And then something – a memory – had penetrated my mind. A blurred past that may have happened to someone else entirely. Something that I don't remember happening. A beautiful girl. A scarred lady. Blood everywhere. Weeping. “YOU KILLED HER!” Then I was pulled back to the reality again, leaving me stunned and confused. What was that all about? I tried focused to the real thing that was happening. My Roza was yelling at me to go out and she'll call other guardians to get me. “Roza. Please. No. I love you so much that it hurts me.” “I can see that.” she said sarcastically. “Please, hear me out. I'm leaving. I'm going back to Russia tomorrow. I'm not going back here again. Just let my love be with you.” She just nodded, “Now, get out.” I complied. I walked towards my room as fast as possible. I took a shower and hit my bed. I started to replay her words that triggered something in me. _“Do I have to tell you the truth if you already know it?”_ Then the blur. The commotion. Someone whispering in my ear... _Kill her. Kill the one you loved the most. And then you'll be free..._ In some ways, the voice was familiar. A woman's voice that bugged me a lot...Tasha. Kill the one that I loved most? Could it be possible that I killed Rose? My sweet Roza? No, that seems impossible. I couldn't do that. But then, everything has a connection. Then it hit me like a million bulldozers might. Tasha had used compulsion for me to kill Roza? Wait...there was this one time when they had told Rose that we're already in England so that she won't run and come for me. And then I got drunk and things got blurry. My head started to spin but I pushed further. Somehow, I got a hold of a stake. Then a frantic voice spoke, “Guardian Belikov! Please! Put the stake down!” It was Alberta. I didn't listen and raised the stake much higher. “Belikov!” Hans yelled. “You are not Strigoi anymore, Dimitri! Please! Put the stake down. For me. For your Roza.” Tears poured freely from my eyes like endless waterfalls. Regret seeped inside me. I was a fool. I failed myself. I failed the one who supposed to me my everything. Now, I understand why everybody had changed. Especially around me. Because I am hated. I fought the urge to kill myself. I must be dead. I wanted so badly to do that right now. I wasn't meant to live another day. I should've placed the stake on the ground. Instead, I placed it inside my Roza's heart. I had killed my Roza. Without mercy. I deserved to die.

 

 


	9. Rose: Broken Arrow (Pixie Lott)

At long last, Adrian turned to face me. I had called him a hundred times already but he was engrossed in texting someone – probably Sydney. I knew that he'll never get a single chance from her. She's an Alchemist, for God's sake! And they don't do human-vampire dating. Sydney had told me that earlier. Speaking of him and Sydney, the Russian gave me a pretty big piece of his Zen lessons and crappy advice yesterday. Because he witnessed Adrian 'cheating' on me. If only he knew. I tried hard not to laugh my ass off because of his reaction about it. Our little play here had gone so far already. He's just jealous. It's already eating him alive. And I can't stand that anymore.

“So, Little dhampir, what do we have here?”

“I can't.”

“Can't what?”

“You're – you're right.”

“I am right? Really? It's the first time I heard that phrase from Rosemarie Hathaway herself. I don't even know it's in your vocabulary!”

I frowned at him. I'm being serious here. I don't – can't – do this anymore. I can't go out there anymore wearing these mask made of vengeance. It's hard to admit but, I'm still in love with him. With Dimitri Belikov. Even though he had originally killed me a long time ago.

Well, it's all my fault, really. And I had realized this only yesterday, after he left my room. All too late. Lissa had already explained to me that Tasha hired a couple of spirit users in order to erase me from the surface of the earth, using Dimitri. She got him very drunk when she did that so Dimitri would be powerless against it. But I still blamed Dimitri for doing it to me. For thinking that he' s an idiot for not stopping himself when he got the chance to. And I believed that his love was not strong enough to conquer what they did to him. Now, I'm blaming myself for doing that. I never thought about how he'd feel if he found out about that night that Tasha made him forget. I should but the blame on Tasha and hunt her down for it, but now's not the time for that. Dimitri's leaving me again and I can't let that happen. But I had to thank Adrian for everything he did for me first. And maybe give him some tips for courting an Alchemist.

I let out a sigh, “Adrian. I mean it. You're right. And I am wrong. We should have stopped this before it had gone this far.” He nodded and gestured for me to continue.

“Dimitri talked to me last night. He said you're cheating on me with Sydney. I told him some sentences that really hurt him, triggering some of his memories...”

Adrian shook his head, “No...don't tell me he knew about you dying.”

“He knew. I saw it in his eyes. The realization...oh! It's killing him Adrian.”

He licked his lips, “Well, just come back to him. Treasure him. Love him. And most of all, forgive him.”

I pondered his words. Can I really forgive him? Does my heart loves him so much that it buries the hatred? I survived the accident, yes. But it's because of myself. I fought hard to live, without the aid of anything and that set me free from spirit. And without the bond, I could repair my life. But in reality, that didn't repaired me. I can't be repaired anymore. I've been scarred. Scarred forever. Instead, I made a different Rosemarie Hathaway. A much different person. But a huge part of me is still terribly missing...

“Little dhampir, you can do this. It can fix you, heal your heart. Trust me. I've been going into that department these times.”

I had to smirk on that, “Why? Because of a certain Alchemist?”

He simply nodded.

I didn't push it further. I don't want to hear a sappy love story while mine's crashing down before my very eyes while knowing it's entirely my fault.

“I don't know what to do, Adrian. Part of me hates him and another part loves him.”

“Then follow the dominant part.”

I sat on the floor of the library, and Adrian imitated me. We're the only ones here who's up and talking. We had the whole library for the two of us – at least for this hour.

“H – how do I know what's the dominant part?”

“Then do what's right and at the same time, makes you happy.”

“Oh, no. Did you spend a lot of time with the Russian? You're starting to adopt his Zen lessons, believe me.”

He chuckled, “Well, he used to be my guardian.”

I rolled my eyes at him, “Whatever. So, about that. The right thing and the thing that makes me happy? I don't think there's such a thing. Everything that makes me happy is wrong.”

He ticked me off, “That's not exactly true, little dhampir. You know that.”

Can I believe him? Can the right thing make me happy? Really happy? Only one way to find out.

I exhaled audibly, “Well, I can try.”

Adrian's eyes lit up. “That's the spirit. Now go talk to him.”

We stood up and walked toward wherever Dimitri is. While on our epic journey towards our unknown but mysterious destination, Adrian's phone rang.

He picked it up with a grimace, “Sage?”

Sydney talked briskly on the other line. I caught 'exile' and 'now'. Oh, no. Not good. Sydney's busted. Adrian frowned, his face filled with fury.

“What? Why would they do that? Where are you?” I heard Sydney's plea that Adrian would be hurt if he goes there.

I pried the phone of of his hands and placed it on my ear, “Sydney? Tell me where you are. Please.”

She's breathing hard. Like she was running from someone. “Utah.”

“Okay. We'll go there soon as possible.”

Before I could hear her protests, I handed Adrian back his phone. He shook his head, “No, Sage, I would come for you. Remember that. Whatever happens, I'll always come for you. And – ”

She was disconnected. Adrian turned to me. “We really have to go, little dhampir. Please do this for me.” I nodded. “But we need more than just the two of us. We may encounter the unexpected.”

We end up inside Alberta's office instead.

* * *

 “Only for an Alchemist? I thought they despise us? Now, they're asking for our help?” she asked yet again.

Adrian's temper was now diminishing faster and faster. Our time was ticking rapidly. “Guardian Petrov. They've been protecting our secrets for generations! Just a couple of guardians. We just need to save her.”

“So, it's a her, Professor Ivashkov. I see.”

He sighed, “I love her, okay? Just please! We can't go in there alone! We need reinforcements.”

“The Alchemist in question had helped me find Dimitri in Siberia. Just let us repay her.” I reasoned.

Alberta considered this at last. She nodded and took out her phone and called someone. A minute later, Janine Hathaway joined us in her office. Her eyes darted towards us. She entered the room and closed the door behind her.

“You called me, Guardian Petrov?” she asked, guardian mask in place.

She nodded. “You need to accompany Professor Ivashkov and Professor Hathaway in a mission in Utah. You needed to move now.”

We all nodded and paced towards Adrian's car. In seconds, we hit the road. No one spoke. Awkward silence. My mom was driving and Adrian and me were in the backseats. A minute later, Adrian called Sydney.

She answered the third ring. “Sydney? Are you okay? We're on the road now.” Because I was leaning toward him, I can actually hear her sobs through the phone. “My...my father kicked me out of our house. Dis...disowned me and told me I'm not an Al...alchem...ist anymore.”

Adrian made soothing noise, “Shh... Everything would be alright, okay? Trust me. Please.”

I know Alchemists had a huge trust issues. But Sydney...she's another case. Because of all the time we spent with her, we actually changed her views about us. And that made her a traitor among her kind. She's an exile and it's all my fault. Adrian's too. It's his fault that he made her fall for him. Well, he fell for her too. When you thought about it, they kind of...matched. Just like Dimitri and me. As we are both fighters. We both protect everyone that needs protecting. But still, we needed each other to share everything we have in this world. And that's why I turned Adrian down in the past. I don't balance him. I go outdoors. He stays indoors. Dimitri and I were opposites, but at the same time, we were just one and the same. We think alike. We move alike. But Adrian and I rarely on the same page. And with what I'd noticed between him and Sydney, they're so alike in ways that are different. The Alchemists had high expectations from Sydney while nothing productive had expected from Adrian. But still, both of them carry the world's weight on their shoulders.

I turned to my mother, “Mom, could you go even more faster? This is really an emergency.”

She nodded and accelerated. “Well, what is it in Utah?”

“An Alchemist in exile.” Adrian replied.

Through the front mirror, I saw her frown, “Alchemists? When did they ask help from us? They despise us. Last I saw one, he freaked out and ran away.”

Adrian shrugged, “Well, this one is very special.”

“To you.” I added.

“Yes. But she's different from the other Alchemists. When I met her in Italy, she's afraid to reach out. But then she realized that we vampires can be as human as they are. I can say I was the one who had changed her views but she changed my views, too.” he grimaced. “I was a smoking alcoholic. Hell, I even used drugs once. But she taught me how to live my life the way it should be. Now, look at the Adrian Ivashkov I had become. All because of a scared Alchemist I saw while admiring a Mona Lisa painting.”

I pondered his words. Sydney was – and still is – his whole world. We have to save her. I can't have Adrian broken again.

My mom nodded, “Okay. Here we are. Where is she exactly?” Adrian speed-dialed her phone, but no answer. He cursed, commanded mom to stop the car and got outside. We both followed.

After five minutes of searching we finally found Sydney. She's unconscious, with bruises all over her body. Adrian reached out of heal her but I stopped him. “I know you really wanted her to be okay but you know how she felt in using vampire magic, right?”

He nodded and picked up the Alchemist in his arms. We all headed to the car. Adrian laid Sydney on his lap at the backseat with him playing with her hair. I sat on shotgun.

As we neared St. Vlad's, mom's phone rang. “Hathaway.”

There was a male voice on the other line. “What? Is he insane?”

The voice became louder. Mom nodded, “Okay. We're on our way there.” She hang up.

“What is it, mom?” Without looking at me, she told me the words I didn't expect.

“Guardian Belikov tried to hurt himself.”

* * *

 “Miss Sage is okay now. She just needs rest. As for Guardian Belikov, he's bound and inside one of the cells. He's unstoppable. He could use any weapon to inflict pain.”

Dr. Olendski explained to me. What? Dimtri and self-induced pain? I can't believe those words would be in the same sentence. I thanked Dr. Olendski and with one last look at Adrian and Sydney, I headed to the cells where they kept Dimitri. I still can't believe that he would do this. At least, I didn't expect that this would be his reaction with what happened.

I stopped in front of two guardians. “You have to let me enter.” I said.

They moved aside and I walked inside. I easily found his cell. He was facing the wall, hands bound on his back.

“Dimitri.” It was barely a whisper.

He faced me. A lone tear fell down. “Go, Roza.”

I gripped the bars, “No, Dimitri! It's not your fault. It's mine.”

He opened his mouth to protest but I stopped him. “Hear me out. If I hadn't been in the way, Tasha would not have to dispatch me. Then she wouldn't have hired spirit users to use compulsion in you and you wouldn't have don what you did. And I'm still here, am I not? Still perfectly alive.”

“But the memory haunts you every single day.” he spat, voice laced with thick Russian accent.

“It was so long ago and look at me – I'm still alive.”

“But you could've died.”

“ _Could've._ I doesn't matter to me now.”

“Sure, it doesn't. You can't even acknowledge my presence since I got here.” he muttered sarcastically.

Well, that was true. I planned to get back at him with Adrian's help for that night. But I knew I was wrong. I knew it all too late.

“That's why it's my fault. I should've known better than to treat you like that. My bad.”

He sighed, “There's a lot about you that had changed since that night, am I right? And not just in you. Everybody had changed.”

“That's because they learn and experience different things in their lives, Dimitri. Not just because of a trauma that never occurred in anybody.”

I let my hands fall at me sides. He looked down and didn't respond. After a couple of minutes, I started to turn away and leave when I heard his voice.

“Well,” said Dimitri, looking up. Eyes sparkling with suspended tears. “you're now the one who tells me Zen lessons and practical advice crap. Would you be the one who'll command me to do laps, too?”

I should've said something in return. But we could just grin at each other while tears fell freely from our eyes.

* * *

After three days, they finally let Dimitri go. Because I just keep on insisting that he's not a threat. He kept on apologizing over and over for everything in the past days and I kept on telling him to stop.

We were strolling on a park when we decided to talk about Tasha. “Roza, let me explain this to you. I don't loved Tasha. It was you all along. I didn't know why I did that, really. All I knew is that I owe her everything. ”

“Like with Lissa.”

He nodded. “I should've thought of you first. Of how it will affect you. If I hadn't been her guardian, she would never have thought that you're going to be in the way. She would never have compulsed me. It would never had happened. I was a fool.”

I grabbed his hand, “Well, it's in the past. Now, let me explain something to you too. Adrian.”

Can I tell him it was just a stage act? He looked at me intently that made my heart melt. Okay. I'll tell him. But not now. I'm not ruining the moment. “Well, I don't really loved him the way I loved you. I loved him as a brother. I tried to push things farther than friendship but it didn't work. And that goes the same for him.”

“But why did he leave?”

_I'll be leaving with my Sage tomorrow for Italy, little dhampir. Wish us luck! And we wish you and your Comrade the best._

I smiled at Adrian's words. “Well, he found true love. But not me. He found it in an Alchemist.”

Dimitri frowned. “Sydney Sage?”

I nodded. “They sacrificed a lot for each other. Mostly their reputations. Humans think their relationship's disgusting and wrong. Vampires think it was taboo. But they didn't listen to the people around them, they -”

“They listened to their hearts, Roza.” Dimitri finished for me. “I think we should, too.”

He leaned towards me and I cupped his face between my hands. “I missed you so much.”

His love was still in me all this time. Like a broken arrow. “I love you, Comrade.”

Then I kissed him.

“Well, well. Look at this, Justin. Kissing lunch. Yum.” We broke apart just to stare at those three pairs of disgustingly red eyes. Strigoi.

 


	10. Dimitri: Hanging by a Moment (Lifehouse)

Rose and I automatically went to our fighting stunts. I took out my stake from its holder and I can see Rose had already pulled out hers too. The female Strigoi who talked earlier with black hair surveyed both of us.

“You think they were what she told us to find?” The blonde male nodded, “I think they are, Selena. It's what she described. A beautiful and yummy dhampir girl...” he grinned, “and a tall male who will really put up a fight for the girl.”

I would really agree to that. I will really put up a fight for Rose. But who's this _she_ who appeared to be their master _?_

“Can I taste her, Joe? Please?” pleaded Justin. The other male who had dark hair like the Selena's spoke, “Well, a bite won't hurt. _As long as we'll share._ ”

Okay, this Strigoi really don't know who he's messing with.

“Who's she? Your master?” Rose demanded.

Selena smirked, “No way in Hell will you know. But there's something she wanted to show you.”

I frowned, “Where?”

“At the end of that alley.” Justin said.

He pointed to our left side.

Joe laughed and tsked, “Na-uh-uh! We'll never let you go just like that. If you want to see what's waiting for you in that alley, you have to go through us first. We would like a filling dhampir lunch.”

We were circling each other a couple of times before Rose had seen her opening and had thrust her stake into Selena's chest. Her eyes went wide for a second and fell. Joe tried to get her by the back but I kicked him out of the way. He quickly regained his balance and took out a dagger. He tried to injure me with it but I kept on avoiding his strikes. I heard Rose yelp in pain and that made me out of focus. His dagger came to my face, making a diagonal wound on my left cheek. I gripped his wrist and twisted it. After I heard his bones broke, I kicked him in the stomach. He fell hard on the ground and I placed my left foot on top of his chest, applying heavy weight so that he couldn't move. I held the stake just over his heart.

“Nobody can hurt my Roza, understand?” I said through gritted teeth before I plunged the stake inside. I pulled out and turned around to see Rose on her knees. I staggered over to her.

“Roza...”

She looked at me and managed to sit up. I noticed a deep gash on her right arm, blood was flowing out of it steadily.

“Roza! You okay?”

She nodded and looked at the wound, “It will be fine. Lissa would heal it later.”

I shook my head. Later was out of the question. It needs to be treated now. I took out my duster and ripped a piece of my shirt. I gestured for her to come closer. Without a single word, she let me wrap it up, applied weight and waited for it to stop bleeding. I nodded and let go of the arm.

“Thanks, Comrade. But you had one on your cheek, too.” she said, reaching out to touch it but I pulled back.

Instead, I pulled her towards me and planted a kiss on her sweat-dampened forehead. “Don't worry about me, Roza.”

She pulled away and pouted, “That's not fair.”

I looked into her eyes, “Why didn't you meet me?”

I was referring to the note I gave her before leaving. She looked confused, “What?”

“The envelope I gave to your mother before I left...for England.”

She frowned for a moment then looked at me, “It's lost.”

She looked away, “When Mom gave it to me, I was shocked and hurt and confused. So I ran outside, and the was strong. It slipped out of my hands when I broke down...crying.”

She turned to me, “What did you wrote?”

I licked my lips. “I wrote that I regret everything I did the second after it was done. And I asked you to meet me in a restaurant and we'll work it out. I waited there all day long. You didn't came. So I got drunk and...”

I couldn't say anything now. That was _that_ night. And we both knew what happened afterwards. She bit her lip, “So it was really my fault. If I had come to meet you, you wouldn't think of drinking and–”

I placed a finger over her lips for a moment to silence her, “If all of that didn't happened, we wouldn't be here now.”

She smiled and just looked at me. And just looked back at her. We were just hanging by a moment. She laughed after a couple of minutes, “I love you.”

“I love you more, Roza.” I smiled and managed to stand up. Rose tried too but I caught her hand just in time so that she wouldn't fall.

“What would that Strigoi mean 'she had something to show us'? And who is she?” Rose wondered.

I watched her face. Her perfect brows, dazzling eyes, red lips, magnificent hair framing it...wow. Just wow. She's like a tropical flower in the winter-like coldness of my life. She's the sign of the spring in me. The hope. The love. The rebirth. I would die a happy man anytime. As long as I have her. A huge part of me was desperate for changing. A change that this was all different. That we were just a normal couple. No Strigoi that would attack and try to kill us whenever and wherever they pleases.

“Comrade?” she asked.

I snapped out of it, “We would have to go in the alley to find out.”

She nodded, “That may be wise...but what would we see there? More Strigoi to finish us off?”

She could be right but what if something was really there that needs attention? “Let's go check it out.”

She nodded and followed my lead. It was now dark. The cars honked and the apartments and houses had put on their lights. The place the Strigoi said was a narrow alleyway between two abandoned buildings. We entered the mouth of the long, dark alley.

“Hello?” said Rose. Even if it wasn't that loud, her voice echoed around us. “I guess there was nothing in here.”

We continued walking and the darker it got. I could hear mice and other kinds of vermin running around, avoiding us and hiding. As we reached the end of the alley silently, I was sure that nothing was in there and the Strigoi was just toying with us.

Then...Rose sniffed. “What was that?” she asked, disgust written all over her face. I sniffed too and smelled...decay. I pulled out my phone and used it as a light. Rose pulled out hers too. We sniffed and searched the end of the alley for...something when my light had reached something brown. It caught Rose's eyes too. We walked toward it and the smell intensified.

That brown _was_ hair. A long brown hair. Rose picked up a stick to poke it. No movement. The body was lying on her stomach. Her clothes dirty with dust and dried blood. Using her stick, she managed to move the body so it was now lying on her back and when the light reveal her face, Rose gasped.

It was the body of Avery Lazar that stinks.

* * *

 

“What on earth...” Rose trailed off. She looked at me, “Who could do this to her?”

After a few seconds she answered her question, “Strigoi. But the questions is why would they let us know about this?”

“And who would. How would they know that we knew her? And the kill seemed to be a long time ago...”

“Yeah, I could smell that, Comrade.”

In the middle of all of this confusion, my phone rang. I answered it, “Belikov.”

“Dimitri! Where are you and Rose?”

“We're investigating on something...”

“You have to get back at St. Vlad's now! The Queen and Lord Ozera were here! Emergency!”

She hang up.

“We gotta go, Rose–”

“But what about Avery? We would just leave her body like that? What if someone else sees this?”

I spared the body one more glance and turned to Rose, “We would report about that. But first, we had to go back. Guardian Petrov said it was an emergency. The Queen and Lord Ozera needs us.”

“Lissa? What happened to Lissa? She's not hurt, is she?”

“She's not,” I said as calmly as I could. “Now we go back.”

We paced towards the parking and we immediately hit the road and got back. I got outside and pocketed the keys.

"Comrade, you sure drive fast.” she commented beside me as he headed where they were meeting at. And it's in the cafeteria. Classes were suspended. Why? Is there an attack? We were welcomed by many guardians and some familiar Moroi.

Guardian Hathaway hugged Rose fiercely. “What happened to you?”

She looked at me before answering, “A Strigoi attack. Nothing we can't handle.”

She sighed, “I'm so happy you're not–you're okay.”

We seated near where the Queen and her husband were standing. The Queen looked extremely sad. But she ran into Rose's arms. Hugging her while Rose was sitting beside me.

“Rose!” She pulled away and took the piece of cloth off of her arm. She replaced it with her hand. She was healing her. And when she removed her hand, the wound was gone. As if there's no wound to begin with.

Rose smiled at her, “Thanks, Liss. But you shoudn't be doing that.”

She sighed, “I can't stand seeing you hurt, Rose.”

With one last smile, the Queen returned to her original place and placed her hand on top of Lord Ozera's. Christian looked like his whole world had fallen down at his feet. Then Guardian Petrov came, Headmistress Kirova and Guardian Croft following her. She stood beside the Queen clapped here hands. “So, what would we do about this? When will the search of her start?”

Rose spoke up, “Well, who is she?”

Christian cleared his throat. “Aunt Tasha. She's missing. The Borovskys were killed.”

What? How could that be? Rose's eyes widened.

“She was reported to be last seen at California according from the Alchemists.” Guardian Petrov said.

California? Aren't they in England?

“When is this 'last'?” A guardian asked. “I'm sure they could track that. And her destination, too.”

"We were still working on that.”

“Still working? She could be everywhere? She could be hurt!” said another one.

"The information that we're getting was from Miss Sage and Lord Ivashkov and they were in Italy right now. We should even be grateful for their help.”

Everyone shut their mouths at that.

“So, the first party has been released an hour ago. But if they failed, we would send another. And another. As long as Lady Ozera isn't found.” Lissa stated.

Even though Tasha was the one missing and she can be very dangerous, I spent the rest of the meeting staring at Rose. How she talked, how she stand up for herself. And the more I look at her, I was positive that I'm falling even more in love with her. The meeting soon finished and we started to scram. Abe and Janine hugged Rose goodbye.

They turned to me, “Guardian Belikov. I'm happy you're okay.”

I nodded at Janine, unable to say anything. I knew I was wrong to hurt oneself and I _tried_ to do that. “And...about Rose, I guess you're more than capable in taking care of her. But you do hurt her a few times in the past...”

“Mom!” chastised Rose. “Most of it was my fault. He's just a victim of what Tasha did.” I knew it hurts her to say that, but still she did.

Moments passed by before Rose broke the awkward silence, “Mom, Dad, we have to go. Bye!” And she grabbed me by the arm and turned away from them.

"They're so annoying!” she muttered, hiding her face in her hands. I pried them off. “Well, they're just like you.”

She chuckled and grabbed my hand.

“Dimitri, I'm scared.” she admitted.

I pulled her to me for a hug. “It's Tasha. What would we do? She can be lurking around...as a Strigoi.” she said.

I tightened my hold onto her body, “Or maybe she's in grave danger, Roza.”

She pondered my words then nodded in my chest. “If she'll come back as Strigoi, we'll both face her. You'll never be alone. I'm not leaving you again. Not again, not ever.” I kissed the top of her head, wishing it's enough to take away her fear.

“I'll chase after you wherever you go. And I'll stand here forever until you tell me to move.” She pulled away to smile at me. She pecked my lips. She stared at each other while the world passed us by. I was contented here. There's nothing else to do. Just hanging by a moment here...with my Roza. And everything would be alright.


	11. Rose: Pressure (Paramore)

 

Calls had been made. People had been sent. Orders had been released. Still, nothing was known about Tasha Ozera's current location. Even the Alchemists had lost track of her. When they retrieved Avery's body from the dark alley, they immediately sent it to the autopsy room. And based from the results, she was battered, tortured, drained and bitten several times.

Poor Avery. No wonder her father was really depressed and mad about it. We told our stories to Alberta and to my Mom about the Strigoi attack. The 'her' that the Strigoi were referring to may be Tasha. And that's their current speculation. The whole Moroi government's doing everything they could just to find her because if she was really Strigoi, she could be really deadly. She could even be the one who killed Avery. As I was standing on the grounds, arms crossed, watching both Moroi and dhapirs ran to where they are needed and shout commands at each other, my name was yelled. “ROSE!”

I turned around to see my father. “Baba, what is it?”

His face was grim. It's a bad news. “The news at the television. There was a killing-spree. Eighteen girls were killed. All humans. With slit throat and a bite mark. Could be her.”

“Well, Tasha could definitely do that. Even if she's a Moroi or Strigoi.”

“I know. And...we need you to accompany Lissa to a meeting. It's in Oklahoma. We can't risk anything so we're sending you in. It's gonna be you, Lissa, and other six guardians.” I nodded.

Anything for Lissa and the Moroi. _They come first._

I walked towards the lot with Abe and was greeted by Dimitri, Mom, Lissa and the guardians he spoke of. I went to Lissa and hugged her, “Oh, Liss!”

She pulled away, “We would get through this. We would. Even without any spirit bonds. Promise.”

I nodded. They started to head towards the waiting car. My parents just nodded at me before leaving, holding hands. Gross. Dimitri turned to me. “Be careful, milaya moya.”

I nodded and pressed a kiss on his lips before joining them inside. I sat beside Lissa at the back. Once he were in the road, she turned to me. “Both of you were really happy. Your auras – they're a sight to behold. I'm very happy for you, Rose.”

I smiled, “Well, as I can see, you're happy too. You have Christian and Crizza.”

“And a million responsibilities from being queen.”

“Well, you have me.”

“I know.”

We giggled and laughed. We replayed every scene from our time in St. Vladimir's and laughed about it until tears sprang from our eyes. The guardians in tow doesn't seem to care. We talked about Dimitri and Christian. And Kirova and Alberta. And Sydney and Adrian. And about any other things. What can we do? It's a BFF thing.

The way to the meeting was more fun than the meeting itself. After those four agonizing hours that I spent listening–guardians on duty doesn't have the authority to speak–to the argument about Tasha and the Borovskys to Lissa's failure, we all headed silently and vigilantly towards the car. And as suspected, there were Strigoi. And there were many of them.

“GET LISSA OUT OF HERE!” I yelled to the other four guardians.

They obeyed and pushed Lissa into the car and ran off quickly. No Strigoi had attacked. As a matter of fact, none of them _had_ moved. As if they waited for them to leave before turning to us. Well, I don't care. As long as she's safe I don't care what these Strigoi do. Now, I had two male guardians beside me. And there were seven Strigoi. This would be a breeze. The Strigoi were all male.

And one of them smiled, “Kill the two males. We don't need them. And remember, don't hurt the beautiful one. We just need her to come with us.”

“So, you didn't want the Queen killed?” I questioned. They all nodded, “Why on earth would we want your Queen when if we had you, we will have everything in this world?”

I was so lost right now. I had a million questions in my mind right now but instead of asking them, I pulled out my stake and attacked. The first Strigoi fell down. In a second, a battle had broke out. The guardians started to fight the other Strigoi too. And...they weren't diminishing. There wasn't just seven Strigoi. It was a dozen of them. Six Strigoi were already dead. Six more. I kicked a Strigoi out my way and staked the other from the back. I looked around me.

The other guardians were...already dead.

A Strigoi kicked me hard on my back and I managed to roll of of the circle they're making to isolate me. I stood up as I regained my balance and fell into a fighting stance. _Don't hesitate,_ a mental Dimitri said to me. I charged, my stake pointing towards their chest. And as I near, it collided into the heart of the first Strigoi. But the other one had yanked me by the hair and tossed me aside, and landed against a hard wall.

“I said don't hurt her!” said another Strigoi. My head was spinning and my vision blurred that I couldn't make out any shape anymore. Still, I manage to be on my feet, thanks a lot to the wall. Then I could hear a Strigoi charging toward me and I went out of the way just in time. Shit. I wish Sydney was here to clean this up. I don't get it why no one had heard us by now. I'm fighting them off for almost an hour! Well, I wished anyone–Dimitri, Mom, Alberta–was here. The world swayed around me. And then something–with a great pressure–had knocked me on all fours. I could hear a girl's chuckle before being lifted up.

Then, I knew nothing but darkness.

* * *

 

I had to blink several times to know what had happened to the poor me. Everything was a blur. In my current situation, you could say I'm like a caterpillar in a cocoon. But instead of a chrysalis and a tree branch, it was a heavy metal chain and a cold pole made of steel. Like the ones dancers used for pole dancing. And there's no light. And I really couldn't see anything. And when I tried to move, the chains rattled.

“So, nice to see you in a new perspective, Rosemarie. In your appearance, it's too tempting. I feel this urge to drain you then and there. But I had to taste a sample, of course. And I found it delectable.”

I knew that voice. The voice that haunted me. That haunted Dimitri. That haunted both of us. Tasha. And she was Strigoi. I would've been okay with it and just try to find an escape when Christian pierced my mind. His parents were Strigoi and his reputation has been stained because of that! And now his aunt...and she's the only relative he has now. I placed myself in Christian's shoes and for that moment, I don't know what would I do.

“Tasha. We could help you. Just release me. We would turn you back into a Moroi! Think about Christian!”

I was surprised of how weak my voice sounded. Am I that weak against her? She just laughed, “Why on earth would I want to be Moroi again? I had everything! And it wasn't even forced to start with, Rose. I _chose_ to be Strigoi. And as for my nephew, I should awaken him, too. And we would live forever!”

The 'think about Christian' statement didn't shake some sense into her. Then I knew what exactly would force even a little sense. “Tasha, please! What about Dimitri? What would he think of you when he sees you now?”

She laughed again and suddenly there were lights in the room or whatever place I am now. I had to blink twice just to looked around me and to know what is around me. And that 'what' turned to be dozens of Strigoi, looking at me hungrily. I was in a warehouse. A candy warehouse, considering the candies, wrappers and mixtures everywhere. Somewhere in Oklahoma. Or maybe not in Oklahoma anymore. How long had been out?

Tasha was in front of me, mocking me with those red eyes of hers. “Well, Dimitri would be joining me soon. I'll reawaken him.”

Re-awaken? Could that be even possible?

“He'll never let that happen. He won't choose to be Strigoi again!”

She winked at me, “But if your life was on the line...I don't think he'll have any other options.”

I gritted my teeth. She was right. If my life was in danger, he would do anything. And I'm scared of what would he do. And I fear I might break. And I fear I can't take it. “How many times do we have to tell you–and you would understand–that Dimitri doesn't love you the way you wanted to, Tasha?”

She didn't say a thing.

I continued. “FACE IT. HE. DOESN'T. LOVE YOU. HE'LL. NEVER. DO.”

She screamed. A horrible Strigoi scream. And I can't cover my ears. Shit. I really pissed her off. She then looked at me with anger. Too much anger.

She grinned devilishly, “Don't worry, we'll let him choose later. It's between Tasha Ozera, she who loved him and would do anything for him, even as Strigoi or Rose Hathaway, she who used a certain Ivashkov boy to break him and tore him apart. And as Strigoi...I guess he wouldn't choose you.”

Her words hit me like a million silver stakes like. She does know about me and Adrian! How could that happen? And would she tell Dimitri about that? If she did, would he still love me? Or choose the Strigoi Tasha, turn her back and they would live happily ever after? My mind was bombarded by a million questions. What if this, what if that? I can feel the pressure drawing closer and closer and closer.

“So, Hathaway, see you later. And later, you would be just like me.”

She then walked out, her laughter echoing around me. After the door banged shut behind her as she exited, all I heard were words of how sweet would I taste and how powerful would I become made by the Strigoi that enclosed me, letting me feel suffocated. If I, somehow, escaped these chains, I would be facing a hundred Striigoi. And that would be suicide. Well, death is better than being Strigoi.

I gritted my teeth. Tasha. Without her in this planet–dead, alive or immortal–would always be better. We're better off without her. Really, really better. But now, in this reality, it wouldn't be possible.

I can't even be certain if Dimitri would save me from this. Lissa would. Maybe. But Christian? It's her aunt. He would even ask Lissa to stake her with a spirit-charmed silver stake just to get her back and he would let me be eaten by Strigoi.

Tasha's a relative. And I'm just a friend. And Lissa's too kind. She would save her.

Now, I am losing hope that I would survive this. Maybe this is the end of me. Of Rosemarie Hathaway. It was like I was in Portland just yesterday. Now, I was here in a dark was it well spent?

As I readied myself for my incoming death, Tasha came in. With an axe. Was it for me? Was it for my throat? She walked toward me and I was sure that she would kill me when she freed me from the chains that enveloped me from shoulder to feet. I slumped against the cool floor.

I was weak. Really weak. I tried to move my hand towards my neck but I just can't. I don't have the energy to. Slowly, I raised my hand inch by inch until It reached its destination. And as suspected, bite marks where there. They made me weak from blood loss so that I couldn't fight them. I am outnumbered by them anyway. Tasha lowered herself to look directly into my eyes. I fought hard not to spit on her ashen face.

“Well, you could say goodbye to your life as a dhampir while your blood drains, right?”

She would really turn me! I had to fight! But I could barely move my hand to my neck. It was like I was paralyzed. I can feel almost nothing.

I closed my eyes and gulped. “Why are you doing this?” I asked her. My voice came out as a whisper so soft it was barely audible.

She laughed coldly, “For revenge. And it had to be like daggers made of ice. So it would hurt a lot. It would freeze you as it kills you.” I could feel her smirking now. “And you know, Rosemarie Hathaway, revenge is best served cold.”

_Hey, that was my line!_

I opened my mouth to say that but her fangs were already piercing my neck. It stung for a second then all I felt was bliss caused by endorphins. This was my end as me. I knew the next time I open my eyes I would be a red-eyed monster.

In my mind's eye. I saw faces. Lissa. She was my sister. Not biologically but emotionally. I was with her since we were kids. And now, I'm turning to an abomination. And I could imagine her weeping and she would do anything to bring me back from being Strigoi. Lissa's angelic face vanished and replaced by a handsome, Russian one. Dimitri.

Oh, Dimitri. He was my soulmate. He was my Yin and I am his Yang. We were total opposites but together, we were in harmony.

Then his face remodeled into Christian and his ever sardonic smirk. He was like the brother I never had. Even though we spend our time teasing and joking around, we were pretty protective towards each other.

And for Lissa, we would both jump a cliff for her. And we would even race each other towards our deaths for her. Then Christian's hair become brown. Blue eyes turned emerald green. His nose sharpened and the smirk became a sweet but devilish grin. Adrian Ivashkov. He was my bestfriend. When I told him he wasn't the one, he was hurt but freely accepted it. He then flew to Italy to start anew. And when he came back, he was totally changed. He became the total opposite of what he was. I always knew there was more of him.

Adrian's face become two, taking the image of Janine Hathaway and Abe Mazur. My parents. They loved me. Really, really loved me. And I longed for them. Their love. I knew they would be the ones who'd be affected the most by this.

But if this was really my future. If this is what in store for me, then so be it. But what would happen afterwards? Would they kill Tasha? Would they honor my death? Would they forget me and go on with their lives? Would Lissa find another bestfriend? Would Christian forgive his Aunt for what she did? Would Dimitri love another? Would Adrian turn into his old self again? Would my parents blame themselves? I had a million questions in my mind now. And I had to let them go. Because there are some things I would never know.

And I let the life fade from me.

 

 


	12. Dimitri: It Ends Tonight (The All-American Rejects)

 

I was on my way to my room to call Rose and check on them when I heard some crying, yelling and screaming from the lot. As fast as my feet can carry me, I ran towards the group of people around the Queen's car.

The Queen's car. Roza would be there. What happened?

My head is pounding and yelling that there's something wrong. Terribly wrong. As I neared, I can see Lissa – the Queen – weep into Lord Ozera's clothes, effectively soaking them. But no Rose. Where could she be? She must be here!

Calm yourself, Belikov. Maybe she was just doing something and will be back, my mind offered. As my feelings calmed down, I heard the words that I am dreading to hear. And it was from Lissa's lips.

“Rose! Oh, Rose...” the Queen mumbled endlessly.

What about Rose? WHAT? I felt my blood boil. I paced toward them, every movement agonizing me. My heartbeat thumped all around me, echoing every sound. Everything was in slow mo. I felt like I was in a trance. Rose's name was said all the time. Some shed tears. Some was screaming in fury. But me? I can't move. I was frozen. I was paralyzed.

I was glued to the floor beneath my feet. “Guardian Belikov?”

The voice brought me back to my reality. Well, I don't know what was my reality by now. It was Janine Hathaway. Her face was stormy. Tears was flowing freely down her cheeks like a lovely waterfall. In her most professional voice, she said the words most painful for a mother to say.

“Rose is missing. And Strigoi took her. She's gone.”

That confirmed it. Tears fell from my eyes before I could stop them. It was like my world was shattered by its foundations. I might as well killed a million times.

My Roza. My beautiful and loving Roza. Gone. Just like that. What unforgivable crime did I do to be punished like this? I know I did uncountable bad things in my lifetime. But was my pain and agony and regret wasn't enough to repay all of that? Well, certainly not. But why is my Roza's the one doing the paying? Why not me? I let myself drop on my knees.

Viscous sobs racked through my body. I was a Guardian. A respected one. But all of that crumbled like paper ablaze. Everything that matters was Roza. I felt a warm hand on my shoulder and I looked up. It was Lissa. She helped me stood and gathered me in her Moroi arms.

“Oh, Dimitri. I need her. I need her here. With me. With us. Please, Dimitri. Tell me we are going to find her!” I hugged her back, “I promise. We're gonna get her back.”

* * *

“So, what would we do first?” Lissa asked across the room, and in a very Queenly manner.

We were in the Queen's chamber. Lord Ozera, the Queen, me, Guardian Hathaway and Abe.

"We have to know where she is.” I said as I toyed a hunting dagger between my fingers. There is only one thought I had in my mind: Save my Roza. She was the only thing that made living in this cruel world worth it. She was worth everything in this world. She has life. She breathed it. Everything brightens wherever her feet were.

“So, shall I say we contact Sydney?” Abe asked.

We all nodded. Sydney Sage and Adrian Ivashkov were the only ones who can find her whereabouts. Lissa then asked her assistant to bring her laptop.

“Aren't we disrupting them? We were depending on them the past days...” Janine said.

Well, she's right. They were in a romantic city and they were in love. And I envy them. Even if his family thinks he was insane and needed rehab and the Alchemists can broke in their apartment any second and drag her away from him. Still, their love was strong enough to stand the tide. My love for Rose was eternal but I was weak enough that she was taken away from me.

As Lissa contact them via Skype, Christian spoke, “Well, we are. But they were too worried about us that they could keep it in their pants.”

Lissa then placed her laptop on top of the round table at the center of the room. “Well, come here to have a view.” she said with a smirk on her voice. We gathered in front of her laptop, and in the screen Sydney was there. She looked that we'd dragged her out of her bed, with messy hair and shadows under her eyes.

“Hey, is everything all right? Sorry for my appearance but I'm awake enough to help. Is Tasha found yet?”

She shook her head and answered her own question. “Well, no. It was obvious.”

“Sydney, we're sorry we woke you up. We know it's midnight for you.” Lissa said with such sweetness in her voice.

Sydney just grinned, “I'm used to it. So..”

Lissa gulped. “Well, Tasha hasn't been found yet. And I am from a meeting this dawn – afternoon – and Rose...she was been kidnapped.”

Sydney's eyes bulged. “WHAT?” she composed herself, “Sorry.”

Abe smirked beside me, “No need. You Alchemists were naturally jumpy.”

All eyes turned to him and he just grinned, “Well, go on then.”

“So, is Tasha the culprit?” inquired Sydney.

“More likely.” Janine said.

She nodded, “Okay. You guys wait. I'll go wake Adrian.”

She then was out of the screen, leaving us with the sight of their – unbelievably – clean apartment. Seems that Sydney was always cleaning.

Then we heard some loud male mumbling that constantly says that it's too early to wake up.

Then Sydney whispered something that earned a “WHAT? Why didn't you tell me earlier?”

Then she returned on the screen but this time Adrian was beside her.

He grinned at us. “So, guys. Are you having fun yet? You're seeing a god in the screen. And well, you looked like awed in my prescience.”

Sydney hit the back of his head, “Focus Adrian! This isn't the time for your nonsense!”

Abe chuckled, “See Adrian? That's what you get when you fall for an Alchemist. Bruises and black eyes.”

Adrian nodded, “Well, you're certainly right Abe.”

Sydney glared at Abe though the screen, “Get on with it, Abe!”

Abe nodded, “So, Adrian, could you find Rose through her dreams?”

We got an immediate answer, “Sure.”

He leaned and gave Sydney a peck on the lips, “See you later, my beautiful lily.”

He then stood up then disappeared from the screen.

She turned to us, blushing. “So, what would we do in the meantime?”

Lissa laughed, “Urgencies aside, but you're blushing. You're in love, Sydney.”

Sydney just smiled but I can tell she's embarrassed by now, “Well, he's a creature of the night. And I don't know why it has to be him.”

“He's in love with you too.” I said to her.

She smiled sadly, “I'm so sorry, Dimitri. I wish I could do more than this. I wish we were there to help you guys more.”

I shook my head. “No. You deserved happiness. You had sacrificed more than you needed to.”

“But I think everybody deserved happiness. Especially you. As Adrian had told me, you've gone through a lot.”

I was touched by her concern. “Yeah. And I need her to survive.”

The exiled Alchemist smiled, “Yes, you do. And I wonder how can you be in control like that.”

Oh, my insides are raging. If it was any other way, I'll be in the streets by now, burning the town inch by inch until I find my Rose.

“Oh, I'm losing it, believe me.” S

he nodded, “Must be hard. Don't worry, we will find her. I swear to God.”

“Speaking of that,” said Christian. “I heard Adrian had converted his religion to yours. Is that true?”

Sydney flashed a grin of happiness, “Yep. He did.”

Christian gaped, “Damn. That man is in love.”

Before the blond girl in the screen could reply, Adrian gasped out her name and asked her to come over quickly and bring the web camera with her. And Adrian was lying on their bed, sweat dampening his hair. He sat up and looked at us or in reality, the camera.

“I found her. She's in Oklahoma. In a candy factory. But hurry! Tasha was there and had her bound from neck to toe. There's no escape! She will turn her! And she was saying that she'll re-awaken Dimitri in change of Rose.”

NO. This can't be happening. Tasha's a Strigoi.

“What? My aunt's a Strigoi?” Christian said.

Adrian nodded. Christian just nodded as Lissa placed an arm around him.

“Re-awaken?” Sydney echoed beside him as she wiped his sweat away with a towel. “I don't think that's possible.”

“Yes, I don't think so, Sage.”

Lissa frowned. “How did you got all of this? Spirit dream?”

Sydney shook her head, “Adrian could reach into her mind without having her asleep. There, he could see the events happening in front of Rose. It's like if you had a spirit bond. Except, well, there is no bond. You guys had to go now. Rose needs you.”

But what about the Strigoi thing?

“Wait, what is it about the re-awaken thing?” I asked.

“Well, we had a situation here that he was once a Strigoi and turned back by a spirit user. Strigoi had attacked him and tried to turn him but it didn't work. We researched on it, and found out that dhampirs and Moroi that has been turned back by spirit couldn't be turned again. They became immune to it, I guess.” Adrian explained.

That was helpful. I could use that fact later. “Go now, Belikov. She needs you and we also need our time alone.”

That earned a smack in the nape from Sydney. “Adrian!”

Then they were disconnected.

Lissa turned off he laptop and turned to us, “Come on, guys! We had a lot to do.”

We all stood up, gathered our stakes and weapons. It will be me, Christian, Lissa, Abe, Janine and other ten guardians. On the road I kept my mind off the possibilities of what could happen. I would die for my Roza. And have to live again in order to protect her over and over. I would spent a million eternities in hell just to save her.

* * *

“So, here it is. There was only one candy factory in Oklahoma suspicious enough to be a Strigoi hideout.” Janine explained to us as we got out of the car.

I sucked in an ample amount of oxygen as I looked at the place. I looked at the others.

“Once we're in there, there's no going back. We die or survive.”

They all nodded.

“Everything for Rose. She protected me since I was just a kid. She constantly puts her life on the life for me. Now, it's her turn to be saved.” said Lissa.

I nodded and opened the door with a soft sound. The lights were open. I stepped inside and brought my silver stake out of its holder. The warehouse was damp, the water dripping from the ceiling echoing all around. It was completely abandoned but there was still some boxes of sweets all around, mice and cockroaches feasting on them. The windows were broken, the glass scattered on the floor and the cool breeze from outside prevented me from suffocating.

“They would be in the basement.” a guardian behind me said.

I nodded and looked around the place for a way down. I spotted a black square on the left wall. A way down. Bingo. I headed towards it, my silver stake raised. The others followed me close behind.

Just as suspected, a Strigoi came out of the dark. And well, I was much prepared. I clenched my fist around the stake tightly, drew my arm back and pushed it forward at a lightning pace, sending it surging towards my enemy's unsuspecting chest just as blood poured out where the weapon had pierced his heart. He fell down as I removed the stake out of his chest.

As he hit the ground, Strigoi poured from the little black hole like waterfalls. It all instantly became into chaos. I turned into a Strigoi to thrust my stake quickly in her chest. I pulled out just in time to stake another.

In the corner of my eye, Christian was fighting alongside guardians using his element. And Lissa was helping, too. She was using compulsion to distract them or to freeze them up to make it easy for the guardians to stake them. These Strigoi were just turned, I guess. They were not as adept in fighting as other, older ones.

As for the other guardians, led by Janine, took over the last of them, I yelled. “Come on! Down here!” Abe, Lissa and Christian and three other guardians budged and went over to me quickly. Christian made his hand ablaze for us to use as a torch. We made our way down the basement where it was pitch black, weapons ready and bracing ourselves for Strigoi. The way down was damp and there was no way that we could stay silent. Strigoi must have learned that we were coming and was preparing an ambush.

As we stepped down the last of those slippery stairs, there was a door. And there were moaning and sounds of pleasure coming from the inside. Without a second thought, I burst the door open. There were Strigoi. Lots of them. Two dozen, at least. And they were drooling. Because Strigoi Tasha Ozera was sucking the life out of Rose. My Roza. It was my greatest nightmare turned reality. I felt my hands turn into fists.

And a second later, Tasha flew across the room and against the wall. Before I could move, the Strigoi had me. Realization then hit me. I was the one who sent her flying. I turned my head around me and the others were already bound by ropes. Tasha stood up and grinned, showing her fangs. And they had blood. Rose's blood. I tried to break away but seeing Rose like that, lifeless and drained, it weakens me.

“Oh, Dimka. I always knew you were strong. But you were stronger as Strigoi, right? Well, I could re-awaken you! And we will be like this! Young and strong, forever!”

I was strong, yes. But it wasn't worth it. I could be a lot stronger than any Strigoi with my Roza. I opened my mouth to speak, but Lissa was already speaking.

“Tasha. We could turn you back! This must not in your plan–”

“Not in my plan?” Tasha laughed, “This was all in my plan! I chose to be Strigoi! And once Dimitri was mine, I would re-awaken him and we would life forever!”

“You can't re-awaken someone,” spat Christian. “Spirit made them immune to it. So just stop this, Aunt Tasha! This is nonsense!”

“This is not nonsense, Christian! Maybe I could turn you so that you can see the world like I do.”

“No.” That was all Christian said.

I looked at her with such disdain, “Maybe its best you leave me alone, Tasha.”

“Leave you alone?” she echoed.

“Ye. I wanted you out of my life. I don't need you Tasha. My life with you in England was pure hell.”

I know it was a mean, mean thing to say but a Strigoi out of control was more easier to attack. And in the corner of my eye, I could see the others.

“Really? Well, then. Watch me suck the last of your precious Roza's blood and awaken her!”

She paced where she lay and grabbed her by the shirt. But before she could pierce her fangs once more, I grabbed my stake from the ground and she was pinned on the wall. By me. I placed the weapon on her heart. Tasha. My childhood friend. She who always there for me when those bullies in Russia pick on me when we were in St. Basil's. She who helped me to forgive myself. She who –

“JUST DO IT, BELIKOV!” I didn't turned to look who was it but I knew it was Christian.

Just do it. Three words. But can I?I looked at Tasha, who was grinning madly. She knew I was hesitating. Then, the Strigoi I pinned burst into flames.

“GET ON WITH IT!” Christian shouted behind.

This is for my Roza. So, I pulled my stake back and stabbed Tasha, my dear friend turned Strigoi, in her heart. I pulled out, letting her body fell lifeless. I wonder why the other Strigoi didn't move.

They just stared at us in horror. I gave the final blow. Speaking of Strigoi, they lunged at me and the others. And again, a battle broke out.

I made my way where Christian was fighting, “That must be hard for you.”

“Yep. But that was for the best. She chose this, Dimitri. It was necessary. She needed to stop and it's the only way.”

I nodded as I staked a Strigoi from the back. As the last of those filth fell, I staggered over to where Rose lay.

I took her form in my arms and cradled her and cupped her cold and lifeless cheek, “Oh, Roza! Roza... Please forgive me. Please. This won't happen again.”

Janine came to us and checked her pulse. She sighed out of relief, “She's okay. Just so much blood loss. She's not turned yet. But we needed to take her back to the Court as soon as possible.”

She stood up to call someone but the Queen stopped her. “There's no need for that.” Lissa stated.

She knelt in front of us and placed both of her hands on Rose's chest. She closed her eyes and he hand glowed slightly. I felt Rose warmed in my arms and she moaned. She opened her arms and snapped at Lissa, “I told you don't ever do that!”

Lissa laughed and stood up, “Sorry. Stubborn friend here.”

Christian then went to her and hugged her from behind, asking her if she's okay. “Comrade?” she asked.

I turned to her and in an instant, everything vanished. It was just the two of us in this world. “Yes, my Roza?” I said, tightening my grip on her.

“I love you.” she breathed. “So, so much Comrade. And I'm sorry.”

“Sorry? For what?”

She faced me but not escaping my arms, “When Tasha held me captive, I doubted you. I thought you wouldn't come for me.”

I hushed her, “My Roza, I would always come for you. No matter what. Even if I could have a debt in heaven or hell. I'd pay it just for you.”

She sighed and looked away, “I don't deserve you.”

I kissed her hair, “Nope. You deserved much, much more than me.”

With her dhampir speed, she turned and hugged me tightly in a space of a heartbeat. “I love you. I love you. I love you.” she chanted over and over again.

“I love you too, milaya moya.” She smiled briefly but her eyes had uncertainties.

“Roza, is there something wrong?”

“What about our future? What about Tasha?”

Tasha? She's the least of it all. And I don't want to need anything in the future. I had her here. With me.

“She's dead, Roza. And as for the future, we would live. Together. And I won't let anything – or anyone – take you away from me.” She smiled at me and the darkness had turn into light. I smiled back and kissed her softy on the lips and murmured, “It all ends tonight, Roza. It all ends tonight.”

 

 

 


	13. Rose: Whoa (Paramore)

_Two years later_

 

I opened my eyes just to meet a pair of dazzling brown ones. I couldn't help but grin at such a wonderful sight.

“Good morning, Comrade.”

He grinned at me with such love, “Good morning, Roza. How's your sleep? Still tired from the flight yesterday?”

Yep. He was becoming more and more protective day by day. I shook my head, still smiling. “Much fine. I'm very hungry, though.”

He stood up and laughed, “Will you be okay waiting? I'll get food downstairs.”

I nodded, “Thanks. I love you,”

He grinned at me, “Love you too, Roza.”

Then he went out of our room. We were in the Ski lodge in Idaho because it's Lissa's birthday. And because she's Queen, she had a lot of guests on the way. And as teachers from St. Vladimir's and one of her closest friends, Dimitri and I went. Of course. And it has been two years. Two years since that accident. With Natasha Ozera.

Yeah, well, it's along, long time ago. I'd hoped for a change in this like since that, and yeah. That change is getting better everyday. Lissa had already changed the law that said that she needs another family member to be Queen, and Jill wasn't in danger now. Many changes had occurred. But still, I feel the same. Because I don't need change exactly. I had everything I needed. My family, my friends and Dimitri. I stood up and grabbed the piece of clothing I first saw. It was Dimitri's shirt from yesterday. It's supposed to go in the laundry but I loved the smell of it. I threw it on me and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. After doing so, sat on the bed, combing my hair.

Then, the door opened and Dimitri entered with a warm smile, “Hi.”

I grinned, “Hi.”

He sat next to be and gave me the bag. “It's chocolate glazed.” he said, his Russian accent made him more delicious than the food itself.

I smiled and grabbed the donut and took a big bite, “Thanks.”

He chuckled and took the brush from my hand and started brushing my hair as I munched the poor donut. He loved to do that every morning. I sighed. This was my happily ever after, coming to life. With him beside me, nothing would be hard. As I finished the last donut, he placed the brush on top of the dresser.

“Come on, Roza. Dress up. They're here.”

I looked at in surprise, “Here? Now? But the party's tonight!”

He grinned, “Well, they wanted to have a little reunion first. It's just us, Roza.”

I stood up and looked at him. He's already dressed. I took my red and black dress from my luggage and proceeded to the bathroom. I washed my hair with conditioner and dried it. I changed to the dress. The dress wasn't revealing. It's just a simple sundress that reached my knees. But yeah, enough to make me look pretty hot. I got out of the bathroom just to see Dimitri gaping at me. Yep, I'm right. It did make me look hot.

He stood up and gathered me in his arms, “Hot. But you're going to freeze once you're outside.”

He grabbed our leather jackets and gloves. He helped me on mine and wore his above his duster. But before we left, I pecked his lips, “I'm excited to get to see them again.”

He smiled and nodded. We then went outside and thanked God it's not yet snowing but it's cold. We walked, hand in hand, towards where we heard laughter and voices. I had to smile to see them making a snowman. Lissa turned to smile at us,

“Oh, there they are!” Jill then ran to me and hugged me, “Rose! I missed you!”

I hugged her back, “I miss you too, Jill.”

I saw then Dimitri was talking to Lissa and Christian with Crizza in his arms. Jill then pulled away and smiled, “I've been happy, Rose.”

I grinned, “I know. I've been too.”

Someone then chuckled, “Yeah. You've got Belikov.”

I knew whose voice is it. Edison Castile. “Eddie! I haven't seen you in ages!” I exclaimed.

He just laughed, “Yeah. Many things had happened.”

I nodded. “I'm sorry.”

He smiled yet again, “It's been a long time. Now, I've got Jill here.”

Eddie hadn't got much of a happy ending. Just a year ago, Mia Rinaldi-Castile, had died of a Strigoi attack in Bahamas. Eddie was out getting groceries and when he got back, their house was raided and burnt to the ground by Strigoi. He was shattered. But Jill was there for him. She made him whole again.

“So, you're doing fine? You're her guardian now, right?” He nodded.

“You love her?” He thought about it and then finally, he nodded.

“And I will never ever leave her. And I will not lose her.”

I smiled and gave him a hug.

“So, so, little dhampir, where's my hug?” A voice behind me said. And I pulled away from Eddie and turned around with a grin. Adrian Ivashkov stood before me. He who had helped me in every way he can. I ran into his arms, “ADRIAN!”

He chuckled as he spun me around. He let go of me with a smile, his emerald eyes shining. “I've missed you, little dhampir.”

“Yeah, you too. So much. Two years had been so long.”

He nodded, “Yep. Too long. But I know we had someone who made it worthwhile.” He stated with a grin.

“Hey, Rose!” I turned to my left and saw Sydney Sage walking up to us, with Dimitri behind her. Dimitri placed his hand on my waist and leaned to kiss my ear, “Love you.”

I smiled and looked at Adrian who had Sydney in his arms and they looked...perfect. Like their limbs were puzzle pieces and when joint together, a beautiful scenery would be made. He looked at her like she's the only thing in this world with color. And as she looked back at him, it was like she was seeing something she didn't believe would exist. I wonder how would Dimitri and I look like when we were in each other's arms. Do we look the same as Adrian and Sydney?

Adrian's laughter brought me back to the waking world, “Hey! Don't need to look like two hungry dogs and the other was a fresh bone. You can save that for later.”

Sydney smiled at his comment, “When, you know, no one's looking and you're in bed.”

Adrian nodded, “Right.”

I glared at them, “You two think alike. Like partners in crime.”

The Alchemist grinned, her lily on her cheek gleaming, “We are, aren't we, Adrian?”

Adrian licked his lips, “Well, sorry, little dhampir. I guess she's right.”

“God, Sydney! You're becoming a girl version of Adrian!” I scowled.

I heard Dimitri chuckle beside me, “Well, prepare for another one.”

I looked at him and back at the couple, confused. “Another what?”

Sydney smiled at me as Adrian placed a hand on her belly's swell. “Well, there will be a little Ivashkov along the way.” Adrian said with a grin.

Oh my God. Sydney's pregnant! Why didn't I noticed it earlier? I walked up to Sydney and hugged her, “Oh! Congratulations!”

I pulled away and punched Adrian lightly on his shoulder, “You must take care of her, Ivashkov. Or else, you will face Rose Hathaway's wrath.” Dimitri then stepped forward beside me, “And Dimitri Belikov's wrath too.”

That made the Moroi's face pale, if they could get any paler. He nodded.

“Rose!” Lissa called behind. We turned to face her. “Would you guys be okay here? Christian and I had to meet someone. And we would bring other guardians.”

We nodded. I stepped forward and hugged her. “Look where are now, Liss. It's been so long.”

She nodded, “I know.” Christian then smiled at me, “Sometimes there were things we had to sacrifice. But it was so worth it.”

Yep. He was right. It was worth it. I leaned down to give Crizza a kiss on the cheek as she was holding her father's hand. She giggled, “I love you, Auntie!”

I laughed, “I love you too, Crizza.”

Christian and Lissa then departed. Jill and Eddie then said their farewells and then proceeded where the feeders were. Adrian and Sydney were the last. As Sydney talked to Dimitri, I talked to the Ivashkov guy.

“So, how did he took it?”

I looked at him, confused. “What?”

“You didn't tell him what we did back in St. Vladimir's.”

I shook my head. “Why didn't you?”

“I can't, Adrian! I was afraid! What if he leave me?”

“What? You'd rather not tell him the truth just to keep him? That's hardly fair. He deserves to know. Go! Tell him now, little dhampir. Or don't tell him at all and let your conscience bug you for eternity, okay?”

I nodded, “I'll try to.”

He grinned, “That's my girl.”

Sydney walked towards us, “Rose? Dimitri was called by your mom. She said he had to do something with your parents. He said he'll see you after, would you be okay?”

I smiled, “Yep, Mrs. Ivashkov.”

She smiled, “I'm still not used to that.”

I looked at them. They were just full of surprises. “You're already married?”

They nodded. I glared at Adrian, “We were your friends! Why didn't you tell anyone?” He smiled and scratched the back of his head, “Well, it kind of happened all of a sudden. The Alchemists were hunting us and if something did happen, I wanted for us to be as one, at least in God's eyes. So we went to a priest and he conducted the ceremony right away and this beautiful lady here became my wife.”

He placed an arm around his wife, “So, little dhampir, we gotta go. See you later.”

 

* * *

 

I watched the sky turned dark from the balcony. Then I smelled aftershave and felt strong but caring hands hugged me from behind.

“Comrade.” He kissed me tenderly for a few seconds and smiled down at me.

“Roza.”

I remembered what Adrian told me before they went to their room. _“Tell him now, little dhampir. Or don't tell him at all and let your conscience bug you for eternity.”_

I looked at him, “Dimitri, I had to tell you something.”

He looked worried and nervous. “What is it?”

I took a deep breath. Okay, here we go... “Dimitri, when you came back from England...” I trailed off.

Will he leave me and hate me? Will he push me away? He looked at me intently, waiting for me to continue.

“Well, when you came back, I asked Adrian to pretend that we were dating and like that, to get back at you for _that_ night.” I looked at him and he was just there, digesting all of it. What would he do? Would he pack and leave? I can't take that. I felt I would break if he leave me. And it's all my fault. Stupid, stupid me! I slowly walked inside and sat on the bed. I felt tears fell down my cheeks but I still continued while sobbing.

“I...should've...realized it sooner...so that...I didn't hurt you that much.” I was so not in control right now. My body was shaking. “IT WAS MY FAULT! ALL MY FAULT!”

He gathered me in my arms but I broke away from him. “HATE ME! LEAVE ME! I don't deserve you!”

He shook me, “No, Roza! Please, just stop this! Tell me what happened!”

I stopped crying and he wiped all the tears. Then, I told him everything Adrian and I did. Well, I'll confess that I can be a little selfish for not telling him until now, for keeping him all to myself. And all because I don't want to be alone and broken. That I don't want to start over again. I looked at him, expecting him to be mad and yell at me for being selfish and walk away. But, he pulled me into an embrace and kissed me tenderly. I pulled away from him even if I wanted to stay like that forever. I needed answers. I needed reassurance.

"Dimitri...”

“Shh...” he said, standing up. “Come here.”

I stood and we walked toward the balcony. He wrapped me in his arms like a blanket. “Don't blame yourself for what happened, Rose. Everyone of us had decisions. And everyone of us had committed mistakes. But we do not cry over spilled milk. But we do go on and make what we did in the past a reason that we are now better individuals.”

He pecked my lips, “And Roza, you did what you did because you had a reason. I trust and love you with all my heart that I believe you had your reasons for the things that you do. And it's all okay now.”

He then kissed my forehead, “I love you, Roza.”

“I had hurt you with what I did. I'm sorry for that.”

“Don't need to. I love you too much to let you go for what you did.”

I smirked, “What if I cheat on you?”

He looked serious, his voice showed too much nervousness. “You won't do that, will you?”

I laughed, “Of course not! My standards were so high that there's only one man that could meet it.”

“Thanks for the ego boost, my Roza.”

“You're welcome. I love you, Comrade.”

“Love you, too, Roza."

Everything had changed. There's too many things that came and went. Still, life goes on. We go on. You need to live it while it last. And as we were looking down at the people getting ready for the party from the balcony, happiness was seeping through our veins and staying there forever. And what else emotion there could be? Well, there were much more emotion that could seep into your veins. Like revenge. An emotion that was best served cold, like a certain Natasha Ozera and a Rosemarie Hathaway once said.

 

 

 


End file.
